These Are My Thoughts Written Down on Paper!

i thought i could start a new blog

2009-05-12T06:34:00.000-07:00

HA! I actually thought I could get away from this one and start a new blog. That is clearly not going to happen. I am way too in love with this one.

Day One: Now I know how forever feels...

2009-02-24T18:13:00.000-08:00

Hey all!
Okay so I may, or may not, have gained a couple of pounds since October. I was at 137 then and now,get ready, my fat butt is at 145!!!!!!!
That's a 13 pound gain that I blame mostly for my lack of exercise. I think it is time to lose it, hence why I am blogging about it. I feel that I should be held accountable for this, and what better way than broadcasting this change to the world, in a sense of speaking.
I figure if President Obama can wake up everyday and go to the gym, why can't I?

Today was great I didn't eat much, walked around my block and replanted a meal. I feel great and I think that in one month I can bring that massive number down to a 135, or maybe even lower:0)

I don't wanna be the rule anymore!

2009-02-06T22:25:00.000-08:00

I just watched He's Just Not That Into You, and I am leaving that movie feeling so- blah. I am sick of living my life through movies and thinking that the acts that play out on the TV will somehow come true.
I will never be sitting in my car and listen to a radio show and fall in love with the guy spilling his heart on the other end. I am not going to fall in love with someone via the Internet, I am not going to fall in my with my best friend, I am not going to be that girl because those girls really are the exception. I am not sure what the rule is, or how us rules get our happy endings, but I know we will somehow...

I may not end up with some crazy, insane love story but I know for a fact that I will find someone, one day. And if that movie taught me anything it is that I am not going to be single forever, I just need to stop thinking about boys who clearly are not that into me. There is no point!
Why spend another second on dreams that will never begin... new found glory said that once, and I think it holds true for me too...

So to all the hopeless romantics out there like me, keep watching those love stories, believe in them but come on...
no one finds the love of their life when they are 10, (sweet home alabama).

Back for sure now... i promise!

2009-02-06T14:13:00.001-08:00

Okay so I was out for a while. but with good reason!
My computer was broken until now. I finally have one that works perfectly, and better yet it didnt take me a while to get used to the keyboard. And to me being able to type with ease is a major selling point when it comes to a laptop.

I will write more in a bit, promise!

Lair if we're keeping score, then we're all chior boys at best!

2009-01-02T00:23:00.000-08:00

First of all:
Forgive me reader for I have sinned. I have not written because of a broken computer and although that is not a valid excuse, I cannot type on any other computer but my own. Sorry but it is not happening! (I think better with my own computer... is that wrong?)

Secondly:
Forget that last post about a theme for this blog. Like I can stick to a theme. You are hearing about my life and are going to like it! (haha)

_______________________________________
So as you can tell by my title I am upset at people who lie right now, but when I am not. But what is better than people lying to you is catching people in the act. No you say, HA- look what I caught in a writers story. The original line he sent me was:

Gas prices may be down, but money still may be coming up a little short after this draining holiday season. With limited funds, a full course load, and the ever mounting cost of textbooks how can students get all their necessary materials for classes?

I told him that was a lot of opinion so he should change it, maybe get someone to say something along those lines so the opinion can be in a quote. The line I got was:

“With limited funds, a full course load, and the ever mounting cost of textbooks, how can students get all their necessary materials for classes?” said junior [name here].

Because that is not the line that you had in the story that you just added a name onto.
AHH!!!

And then I get another gem of my phone broke so I missed your missed calls for the past three days. What I don't understand is how peoples phones always break when you try to call them and why people never check their messages on landlines! BLAH! I mean my computer is broke and I know I did not update the blog but I was still checking the e-mail and getting work done.

I love these lies, long with the million others I have gotten these past few weeks. Do people actually think that I don't look into things? I mean you are talking to the worlds most overly cynical person ever - of course I am going to check it out. GOSH!
This is why the first rule of journalism is to never trust anything people tell you- if your mom says she loves you, ask her proof.

(happy new years by the way!)

Because these things will change...

2008-12-07T13:03:00.000-08:00

First of all, sorry I have not blogged for a while, long story.

Secondly, I just was looking at the Dove Web-site and I am officially in love with it! I knew about their campaign for change for a while, but I did not know how serious they were about it until recently.

Watch this ad:

Now I have said it before, if we are going to talk about feeling insure about your self, I will win that battle most of the time. But I think most girls feel that way. I know it is old news but I know I have a new found love for DOVE about watching this, and I have decided to dedicate this blog to just that, ways to make yourself feel better about you.

I for one am sick of always feeling as if I am not good enough and going through life like it is some kind of competition. NO, not any more.

Finally after how many years I have a theme for this blog, but I think it took this long for me to find what is important to me, and that is not feeling bad about being you.

Falling into you

2008-10-06T21:34:00.000-07:00

I cannot believe I did it!
I make fun of people all of the time for falling into journalistic traps, and I go and do it tonight. I am always sick of it when people ask me how I feel about 9/11. Yes, I know a lot on the subject but after a while I start to have fun with people.
I will make them feel guilty about the way Muslims were treated, and although I was a victim of a lot of hate, I tend to get more emotional when I tell these stories. I am sick of the questions about Islam always being asked to me, and I often wish I could lie about those.

So what about the military?
In the new industry soldiers are seen as easy bait. Get a story about a soldier going to war or coming back and you have at least 10 inches of space in the paper, along with photos, most likely in color and hundreds of people reading your work. Who does not love a story about a solider?
But what about the soldiers themselves?
I love how they are seen as an easy story, and not as complex people. I think this needs to change, and I think that when soldiers hear that people are going to ask them questions they need to feel safe knowing it will not be the same old questions being asked.
As sad as it is, the only time we see a soldier these days is in a political commercial, on the news talking about the war or at war. We rarely speak to those who are not at war.
We never hear the stories of soldiers do not want to fight.

I really wanna change this. Who knows I may be wrong, but there has to be more to our soldiers than what we need on TV.

I might find someone who might actually treat me well!

2008-10-05T21:43:00.000-07:00

I have complained about this before, and I do not know why I am doing it again, but I honestly find this annoying enough to vent about.
I was never too good at this whole dating thing. Hey, it is made for some people but for me it is just annoying. I would rather have the title of girlfriend than to be the girl that a guy is just seeing for fun. But one thing that I find funny is that no guy these days will ever tell a girl when he thinks she is cute. I am sick of having people tell me what the guy is too scared to say to my face. If you want a quick rejection that is the way to do it.

Be open!

I do not understand why people will tell how they feel to everyone but the person who needs to hear it the most.

Opps, I Think I Did It Again!

2008-09-28T19:03:00.000-07:00

Forgive me I have not been blogging. Not because I do not love you all, but I have been a bit busy. I finally found a job! YAY!
But I honestly feel bad for not writing... sorry... more to come soon promise!

Give Me Just Once Inch I Swear That Is All I Need.

2008-09-20T07:10:00.000-07:00

So I finally have employment! YAY!
I start orientation today at Victoria's Secret. I am so excited to finally not have to worry so much about money. I suck at being cheap or managing a budget. Do you have any idea how hard it is to go from paying for meals for your friends or a movie ticket if someone is short on cash, to not being able to do any of those things?

I hope this first day goes well. It is going to be weird being a productive member of society again. My biggest fear, the semi-annual sales and the day after Thanksgiving. Everyone goes to VS on black Friday for a tote bag. I don't think I have it in me to handle that, but lets hope I do. It is going to be upsetting to miss my shopping holiday for the first time in 8 years. :0(

And A Little Bit Of Chicken Fry, And Cold Beer On A Friday Night...

2008-09-16T19:30:00.000-07:00

The last I checked Florida was a part of the south. We were part of the confederate states, and were one of the last states to integrate schools, so we were bunched together with the other southern states in that regard. If you go to northern Florida, all you hear is deep southern accents.

SO WHY IS SOUTH FLORIDA NOT CONSIDERED SOUTHERN!!!

Not everyone down here has a mom that knows the perfect country fried stake recipe. We do not have accents and most people hate country music. Heck, I have had to explain to people what fired pickles are!

I understand this is all due to the massive amounts of immigrants down here, but it still upsets me. We are southern, love it or hate it, geologically that is what we are. Southern culture is fun and full of interesting things that the rest of the country just does not get. And no I am not talking about inbreeding.

The south has some amazing music, and some fun traditions. Like coming out parties, swimming in swimming holes, farming, Southern culture is bound by patriotism and religion. I still have never eaten frog legs or other southern foods but I can honestly say this strange culture that people live out every day only a few miles north of us is one that I think would be fun to explore.

So as Paula Deen, pictures here, would say... get out an explore your southerness ya'll.

Some Day You Might Care And I Wont Be There...

2008-09-15T19:17:00.001-07:00

Message Delayed

Some recipients won't get your message right away, but they will soon.

I sent a message to one of my friends on Facebook today and the above is what the message said on top of the page. It made me laugh because, well... come on without sounding emo this is a huge metaphor!

Not everyone is everyone is going to understand what you are trying to tell them right away, but one day they will.

I need to add more to this, but the words just are not coming out just yet..

How Things Add Up...

2008-09-14T17:40:00.000-07:00

It is so funny how I always make a to-do list at the start of every weekend, and there is always more to add by Sunday. I remember the good old days when today was the day of rest. I officially cannot wait until I can sit in bed, watch movies and eat all day. Those had to be the best days of my life.

Sounds weird I know, but there is nothing better than doing nothing. Not thinking about school or work. Just relaxing and not feeling guilty after. We have made it to this place where we cannot relax or not have anything to do without feeling as if we are not paying our dues to society. There is no shame in doing nothing. There is nothing fun about stress.

Song is overplayed, but it fits.

All I Wanna Do...

2008-09-14T17:39:00.000-07:00

I now think that finding a job is the hardest thing ever!
I got a call back this week though... wish me luck.

No really start wishing.

We'll All Stay Skinny Cause We Just Wont Eat!

2008-09-14T17:17:00.001-07:00

So today was column research day. Which in my case means going to sports bars. I am telling you journalism is the best major to have!
I still have one more place to go tomorrow and I am done. Now I am trying to think of where to hang out next week. Coffee shops, beach theme, sport theme?

So many choices.

Have You Forgotten?

2008-09-11T20:14:00.000-07:00

It is so funny, today is 9/11 and I guess seven years after that horrid day is enough time for people to think of this day as just another cynical holiday. Let's get one thing straight, there is NOTHING rebellious or "cool" about denouncing the importance of today. Innocent people, hard working people from every background died or lost loved ones on this day. Remember how we were all one country in the days following 9/11? Have we forgotten that too?

Today is not about whether or not you agree with the current wars. Or if you think that it was in inside job. It is not about Obama or McCain. It is not about politics what so ever! Today is about remembering those who gave their lives on that day. Today is about remembering the feeling of unity that was within all of us on that way.

I think it is easy for people to put down a day like 9/11 because they see it a symbol for that they do not like about the current wars or president. This is wrong because, well I have never said this before but, it is sort of not American to look down on this day. A part of being patriotic is being able to recognize important days in your countries history and to come together with those who agree or do not agree with your views. Today is about being an American, which all of us are. No matter what your nationality, on 9/11 everyone around the world became an American in spirit. They all felt our pain. The world cried with us. The world prayed for us.

When I think of this day and reflect back on seven years ago my mind goes to one image, the people. Watching people walk around New York with photos of family members, hoping that someone had seen their loved ones. Seeing people covered in dust and jumping out of buildings. I think of the fire fighters, paramedics and police men running in while everyone was running out. I see normal people standing in awe on the streets watching that was going on. I have the image of a nation being shocked and brought together at the same time running through my head. How can this is trivialized?

How anyone can all this day of unity some Hallmark holiday, as some of the people I know have, is beyond me.

As always I leave you with a song. But today I am leaving a tribute to those brave men and women who are out their on the front lines fighting for our freedom.

Where Were You On September 11, 2001, By Alan Jackson:

Have You Forgotten by Darryl Worley

Only in America by Brooks and Dunn

Do not forget about all of the people who passed away on this day and the men and women who have gave their lives in Iraq and Afghanistan. Do not forget about the hero's because they have not forgotten about you and they have not forgotten what they are fighting for.

Never Forget

A Young Boy Two Hands On The Wheel...

2008-09-10T19:58:00.000-07:00

Remember the first time you drove a car? The feeling of the car under you and knowing you were in control of it all. The way you wanted to drive everywhere as soon as you got behind the wheel of the car.

I forgot it too. After years of being stuck in traffic and driving to school or work everyday, the joy of driving is no where near where it was the first time. It was not until yesterday when my little brother got his license e that I realized how much fun it is.

Oh how I miss it!
There really is no better feeling than that.
Ah forget it, let Alan Jackson tell it...

It is so funny how much we take those little things that made us happy when we were younger for granted over time. Driving, used to be fun. Getting your first bank account was amazing. Oh God, you should have seen me when I got my first job. I thought Starbucks was the best company in the world, still do in many ways.

All of those first are so exciting.

Maybe I am being sappy, but we need to reflect back on those things a little more. Watching him get excited about driving, getting nervous before the test, the excitement, all of that came back to me while I watched him.

I was reliving it with him, all of my firsts.

In fact, when I got my first car, which I named Stone Phillips after the news anchor. (PHOTOED ON THE LEFT) my parents surprised me with it. I was babysitting and my dad called me and told me to come outside and to hurry. I came out and saw Stone sitting there in the street. After I took it in for a second, I screamed! Even on of my neighbors came out to see if anything happened. It was love at first sight!

Up until the day I crashed it, and even now, I have never loved a car that much. After my crash I got my current car, named Brain Williams, after the anchor. Even though Brian is newer and has a CD player, unlike Stone, I would still pick it over Williams.

I had all my firsts with Stone, or Stoney as I called it. My first time driving to school alone, going to pick up my friends to see a movie, paying for gas! It is like Alan Jackson said, it is a piece of my childhood that will never be forgotten.

I cannot replace those memories with any car! I wish my brother the best of times when he lives through all of his firsts. Heck, I wish that on all new drivers.

Just Drive Safe!

Making Memories Of Us...

2008-09-09T17:29:00.000-07:00

I used to have a Dell laptop. In fact, it was my first laptop.
I loved that thing up until the day it stopped charging and I got my Gateway.
At the moment my Gateway is broken and we just got the Dell to work again.

I am sitting here typing on the Dell and it feels odd. I do not know how to say it but I just keep thinking back to that Sex and the City when Carrie got her new computer. The new one was fresh, had no last memories of papers once written on it. Going back to an old computer is like reliving all of the good times that were once had with it.

Sappy attachments to objects aside I am upset at my self for one thing when it comes to using this Dell. I deleted a bunch of my old photos on here! I was so excited to see them and like the "smart" person I am, they are all now gone.

Oh Joy!

Football!

2008-09-07T14:20:00.000-07:00

It is officially the best time of year.
Football season has once again started, and so has my tradition of spending my Sunday afternoons on the coach watching games. I do not know if it is wrong of me to tell every employer I have ever had that I cannot work on Sunday because of religious reasons, when it is really because I do not want to miss a game is wrong or not, but I do it anyway.

There is something about the first Sunday of the regular season that is exciting. During the off season I almost forget how much fun it is to check your fantasy team after every play, talk about the game all week and eat like a pig while watching the game.

WELCOME BACK FOOTBALL!
I MISSED YOU!

PS. Once, again the Dolphins lost today, making it 260 something days since their last win. GO PHINS! But at least we gave Bret Frave a nice scare at the end of the game. That has to be worth something.

And They Call It Puppy Love?

2008-09-06T21:12:00.000-07:00

* Photo on the top is of the dog I cheated with, his name is Cookie. The one at the bottom is of Karma.

I love that every time I come home my dog Karma has to smell me. If I had been "cheating" on her by petting another dog, she knows. And she gets really jealous! To the point where she will run away and not play with me. She gets so upset that she will sniff me for hours on end, I guess she is just trying to get the full scent of the other dog.

So I am going to be the first to admit it. I cheat on my dog sometimes with other dogs, and I am okay with it, because I know if she ever sees a nice human and I am not around well, we all know she will let him or her rub her belly.

I find it funny that dogs just know when you are cheating on them. They get hurt by it and they do not know how to react. I love that Karma cares that much, because lets face it having a dog is like having an over protective mother, only smaller and hairier.

She stay up until 3 a.m. waiting for me to come home some nights, she does not complain when I stay up late studying. She will just sit next to me and let me rub behind her ears. She will wake up early when I feel like going on our walk early, and she will always forgive me when I do all of these things.

I guess asking me not to cheat on her is not really asking for a lot.

Oh well.

This is Karma, not a good video. but it's all her.

Like The Wind When It Blew Me Into The Hurricane!

2008-09-06T14:50:00.001-07:00

There is a hurricane.
It is a category 4. Why am I not scared?
When I came back from Canada, Fay about to hit Florida. Lucky for me I did not have cable in my room for two days so I missed all of the coverage. In return I could have cared less about the storm. I don't even know what category it was.
Now that Ike is about to hit us, I have made up my mind not to care.
I want to stay safe but there is no point in tracking its every move. In fact is annoying!

Hope it doesn't hit but my day is not going to be wasted tracking a storm that I have no control over. That and let's face it, there is nothing worse than standing in line for 45 minutes for gas like I did yesterday because I was on E for some storm.

I am not going to lie though, the best part of any storm is watching the reporters when they are on the scene. They try so hard to make rain and wind exciting. Does the reporter need to stand outside to make the point that hurricanes are dangerous?
Both these videos are powerful, only difference is that the one with the reporter makes you wonder why they put him out there.

They must hate this guy for making him stand out during the storm. Poor guy cannot even stand while the anchors are nice and dry inside, and are taking without a care. My concern is that, is coverage of a storm worth the safety of a reporter and his or her camera man or women?

Here I Am Once Again I'm Falling To Pieces

2008-09-05T22:25:00.000-07:00

Okay I am jobless.
Like one of the 6.1% of Americans right now I do not have employment and it is killing me!
It is 1:30 in the morning and I am freaking out about it. I have amazing parents who pay for my stuff but come on, I hate acting like I am 12 and asking for money.
I miss going out!
I miss using my debt card and feeling good about it.
I miss it all.
I have filled out 30 something applications in the past 2 weeks and no call backs, if this is the strong economy they speak of then I do not want to see a weak one. If this is life under an old system then bring on the change.

Politics aside, at the end of the day the world becomes about people like me who are freaking out about payment, I don't care if you are a pitt bull with lipstick, a war vet, brought up in an ethnic family or if you take a train home from work. I DON'T CARE!
I care about what you are going to do to make me be able to pay for gas, get food and live like a normal 19-year-old.
Forget politics I want change.
Both presidential candidates — Senators Barack Obama and John McCain — said through spokesmen that they would favor an economic stimulus package from Congress this fall. "

FORGET THAT!
I WANT NOW! These guys are not president yet, why cant the guy in office do anything?

"

Just A Small Town Girl...

2008-09-03T19:25:00.000-07:00

She comes out in a short shirt and tight cloths, way not to play up the sexiness governor. Is this how all "hockey moms" dress in Alaska?
Oh and no I am not being rude, there is a women wearing a pin saying:Hottest VP! Don't tell me they don't see her as a sex icon.

Mistake number one she made though, she calls it I-RACK!
IT IS E-ROCK! GET IT RIGHT!
I do feel for her that her son is going to Iraq. I feel for war military ones, because I am a member of one. Being a women, I think that she speaks about her family different than a man would, she does it with more passion.

I admire she reached out to families with special needs children. I admire that she cares about the topic because it is an important one, and one that needs to be addressed more. I still do not understand why they keep passing the baby along from person to person. She is trying to play up the family values, which I guess she needs right now. But I do not understand why she is playing up the small town, don't they normally vote Republican anyway. She is not making her self more likable. By the way, why is it wrong for the Democrats to question the Republicans for Palin's experince but the other way around is a sin?

"A small town major is like a community organizer only you have actual respobiablities," nice jab. "Talks One Way in Srantin And One Way In San Fran," as if that choice of city was by chance. Nice job making it seem that all dems are gay, more right wing calls.

"Some in the media consider..." croward boos... "here is a little news flash for those reopters and comminiters I am not going to Washington to seek their good opinon I am going to Washington to help the people of this good country."

EXTRA EXTRA PALIN HATE THE MEDIA AND FROM THAT QUOTE SHE IS GOING TO BE CLOSED IN THE WHITE HOUSE!

"When I stood up to the speical interest groups and lobbiest... true reform is so hard to achieve but with the support of the people of Alaska we shoock things up and but government back on the side of the people," not a bad quote.

I do admire that she got rid of her jet when she came into office, along with her chef and other things but Carter got rid of the presidents yhatt, and gets no credit... weird no?

She says she has saved the state half a billion in vetos, I want to know on what, I am checking it out and will get back to you soon.

"I fought to bring out private sector project and we began nearly 40 billion dollar pipeline to lead America to engergy independence..." Her overall view on the oil was not bad, even what she said about Russia was okay.
On enegery she said, "the fact that drilling wont stop all of our problems doesnt mean we cant do anything at all." She said we need to drill more and look at other engery, eh... not buying it because she wants to use nuclear.

She makes fun of Obama for not using the word victory in the war, well I am sorry Mrs. Palin... IF WE WON WHY ARE MY TROOPS NOT HOME!
WHY IS IT WRONG IF HE WANTS TO FINALLY OPEN TALKS WITH IRAQ AND IF WE ARE A DEMOCRACY SPREADING FREEDOM WE SHOULD READ EVERY ONE THEIR RIGHTS. WE SHOULD SHOW TERROIST THE BEAUTY OF OUR SYSTEM!

"There are those who use change to promote their careers and those like John McCain who use their careers to promote change." *nice one liner.

If McCain is a leader not looking for a fight... he is doing a great job with attack ads.

"Only one man who has truly fought for you..." okay that is nice, but is it Obama's fault that he was too young to fight in Nom? Does not mean he does not love America.

"Join our cause and help America elect a great man as president of the United States."

YES... AND THAT MAN IS OBAMA!

I love how is she trying to paint a reformist image, when a "private attorney is authorized to spend $95,000 of state money to defend her against accusations of abuse of power and that Palin sought pork-barrel projects for her city and state, contrary to her reformist image."
*That's not change that is more the same!

Is No One Seeing The Elephant In The Room...

2008-09-03T19:19:00.001-07:00

Oh the RNC!
There is nothing better.
Anyone else laugh when they saw good ol' Rudy talking behind a New York Skyline back drop.
By the way, if you hear this man speak, he knows NOTHING about foreign policy. NEWS FLASH: RUSSIA DID NOT BREAK ANY INTERNATIONAL LAW WHEN GEORGIA ATTACKED IT!
He should not be making fun of Obamas "300 foreign policy advisers" were not there to tell you that. And when did the Democrats become the party of no religion?

STOP WITH THE CHEAP SHOTS!

You Smile Like A Saint... But You Curse Like A Sailor

2008-09-02T21:08:00.000-07:00

So how about them republicans?
I honestly do not see it to be that big of a deal that Sarah Palin's daughter is having a baby. This happens a lot to families and it does make them seem more normal. What it shows me though is how horrid McCain's judgment was to pick her.

When running for president, don't you think you would pick a vice president who, oh I don't know, knows what the job entitles! And has more international experince, and can put the moral values that she believes in on to her kids. If I am not wrong, the republicans are supposed to be the party that teaches students not to have sex before marriage, so what happens when the same people who preach this cannot practice it?

Okay, maybe I do have an issue with it. I think it is just funny that they "knew" she was having a baby and did not check it out. I want to know how come she is not even defending that she is the mother of her youngest child to dismiss the rumors that it is her daughthers child. This women has been in our lives for what four days and I already do not trust her. They could at least get a good PR on them and have the daughter not hold the baby at the convention. Smart move people, nice damage control.

It is like my friend Alexa said today, did she watch Juno and think to herself, hey I live in Alaska I should do that!

I think that Sarah Palin is the worst choice for McCain and if you think otherwise, ask yourself who you are kidding with that comment.There are so many good republicans out there right now, Charlie Christ, Sonny Perdue, John Cornyn would have all been good choices.

There is nothing wrong with having two white men on a ticket, and to pick a minority just to pick one is wrong and goes against what this democracy stands for.

I cannot wait to see how the rest of this season comes out. Who needs soap operas when you have republicans and democrats?

I'm Out Here On The Front Lines, So Sleep In Peace Tonight...

2008-09-01T09:47:00.000-07:00

So I am reading some articles about the military from the New York Times and I come across this one called, After the Battle, Fighting the Bottle at Home. Now anyone who knows anyone in the military knows that generally when they come back from well, anywhere they drink a lot more. But even more so when they come back from war.

I think when my cousin Mike came home from his first tour of Iraq he drank at least a 12- pack and then everyone else's beers! So it did not come as a shock to me when I read that most of our men and women who come back from war resort to drinking and to using drugs to deal with their post traumatic stress disorder instead of getting help. According to the article one in five soldiers come back from war with mental illness of some sorts. This is really heartbreaking to think about.

What I find odd about this all is that there really is no reason for the drinking and drug use other than pride really.
"In part, this dynamic is rooted in the warrior code. Trained to be tough and ignore their fear, many combat veterans are reluctant to acknowledge psychic wounds. Or they worry that getting help will damage their careers. And so, like Mr. Klecker, they treat themselves with the liquor bottle or illegal drugs."

I understand what a part of being in the military is having the "right stuff." I know it is a sin to talk about dying on the battle field, or problems that come from being in war, but come on! We need to make it okay for soldiers to come home and get help. We need to make them see that we realize that they went through a lot when at battle and that while we may not understand what it is like to be at war, we want to help. Men have been coming back from battle for years, the difference is that before they have had week long boat rides to recover from the realities of wars. They have not been in a war zone one day, worried about getting killed, wishing to come home and then to come home and have flash backs.

Isn't a part of having the "right stuff" is to be strong enough to ask for help?

I have heard so many stories of soldiers who come back from war that become violent, who freak out when they see a car on the side of the road, who do not trust anyone because they cannot mentally come back from the war zone.

From Walter Reed to service men and women drinking too much and using drugs, we need to take better care of out vets!

American Solider by Toby Keith:

Mo Money, Not So Many Problems?

2008-08-31T12:26:00.000-07:00

So I am looking through stories on the Sun-Sentinel Website and I come across this article from the LATimes called, Can a Troubled Economy Actually Improve Public Health?
The article is about how the current state of the economy is somewhat linked to people living longer due to them taking less risks. They are saying how there are less accidents now that people are driving less, and there are drops in obesity as well.

Who knew?

He Was Raised To Think Like His Dad With A Mind Full Of Hate...

2008-08-31T00:37:00.000-07:00

For my multi - ethnic reporting class I was told to go on this Harvard Website to take a test that tells how racist you actually are. I had to take the test to see which I preferred, Arabs or white Americas, blacks or whites, Jewish people or other religions and one test that tested which country you saw better, India, Japan or China.

At first I thought the results of these tests would be dumb, and not have anything to do with me what so ever. Come on what does some guy at Harvard know about my thoughts? Turns out, that guy from Harvard knows a lot about me, GO HARVARD! (There would normally but a mascot name there but Harvard doesn't have one. There is John Harvard but how horrid does Go John Harvard sound?)

According to the test I strongly prefer the Jewish faith over other religions. When I saw the result of this quiz, it made me laugh at first. People always assume that since I am a Muslim girl from Iran I must hate everything that has to do with Judaism. Actually, fact that I strongly prefer the Jewish religion is a direct result of my upbringing with people who happen to be Jewish. Growing up all my close friends have been Jewish. Without sounding stereotypical, my best friends are all Jewish. I love the religion; I honestly think it is a beautiful one filled with a lot of traditions. I grew up going to my friends houses for Passover, Hanukkah, Yom Kippur and other Jewish holidays.

The test results on which race I like better, Arabs or whites, shocked me a little. Thinking that I did not see a difference between blacks and whites I would not see a difference in this category either, turns out I do. I prefer Arabs, only slightly though, over whites. I did not think these results were right at first but I stopped and thought it for a second. I am Persian, and although I am not in anyway ethically similar to Arabs, I am close to them in other ways. We share a region, a religion, although different branches, and similar history. In a way we are neighbors, and aren't you supposed to love thou neighbor?

Who knew this much would come from some test. I guess I owe my friends at Harvard an apology for doubting the school. But honestly when it comes to race I think people can change their views, and that a test does not say it all. I think country band Montgomery Gentry said it best with the first part of their song, Some People Change.

*Not the best quality but here are the lyrics, read them they are beautiful!

His old man was a rebel yeller:
Bad boy to the bone.
He'd say: "Can't trust that other fella,"
He'd judge 'em by the tone of their skin.
He was raised to think like his Dad:
Narrow mind full of hate.
On the road to no-where fast,
Till the Grace of God got in the way.
Then he saw the Light an' hit his knees an' cried an' said a prayer:
Rose up a brand new man; left the old one right there.

Here's to the strong; thanks to the brave.
Don't give up hope: some people change.
Against all odds, against the grain,
Love finds a way: some people change.

She was born with her mother's habit:
You could say: "It's in her blood."
She hates that she's gotta have it:
As she fills her glass up.
An she'd love to kill that bottle,
But all she can think about,
Is a, a better life, a second chance,
An' everyone she's letting down.
She throws that bottle down.

Here's to the strong; thanks to the brave.
Don't give up hope: some people change.
Against all odds, against the grain,
Love finds a way: some people change.

Thank God for those who make it:
Let them be the Light.

(Let them be the light)
(Some people change.)
Here's to the strong; thanks to the brave.
Don't give up hope: some people change.
Against all odds, against the grain,
Love finds a way: some people change.
Some people change.

(Some people change)

I Got a Crush On Obama!

2008-08-28T22:25:00.000-07:00

I remember being in the 11th grade and sitting in my American history class listening to my teacher talk about how he felt when Reagan ran for his first term. He spoke about how moved he felt when he would hear Reagan speak and how he finally felt as if there was hope for the future of his country thanks to him. He felt moved and a part of the cause. When Reagan won he felt as if he had won the election as well. He told us about how Reagan became his voice and that he felt a personal connection to the candidate.

I HAD NO CLUE WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT!

At the time Kerry was running for president and lets face it he was not that good at making young people feel anything. But now that Obama is on the ticket, as corny as this is going to sound, I finally know what he was talking about. There is something that happens when Obama speaks that gives me hope, that makes me feel proud and that change is on the way.

I am not saying that Obama will do for the democrats what Reagan did for the republicans, but he could come as close as any one in his party has ever gotten. Reagan's impacts are still being felt until this day on the party. He set the platform for the party and love him or hate him he was a good politician and a VERY strong speaker!

But so is Obama. He is a better public speaker than McCain. The same way that Reagan outspoke Carter, hands down.

The funny part of this all is that right now the republicans are saying that Obama is too big of a celebrity to make a good president. Yet the one of the best republican presidents, the man who reformed and began a party revolution in this country, was indeed a celebrity.

I am in Love with a Stripper.

2008-08-26T20:43:00.000-07:00

*For class too. We are supposed to blog about something that makes us uneasy and go out and explore it.

As I was driving to a place where I had to do an interview today, I got lost. No, I got really lost! I drove around the Miami International Airport area enough times to make my full tank of gas go down to half a tank. While I was driving I realized that I needed help and stopped at a pink building to ask for directions. What made me turn into it was the sign that said valet. Hey a valet would know his or her way around town, right?

So I pull up and roll down my window, and ask the man for directions. He says, "do you want an application?" I ask my question again, and he tells me where to go but every few seconds he stops and asks me the same question. Now I need a job, but I could not for the life of me figure out why he was asking. As I left I realized that it was a strip club parking lot I was leaving called, The Pink Pussycat.

The thought of that guy asking me if I want to work there still makes me want to throw up. In fact, the whole idea of the adult industry makes me want to throw up. I understand people like it, but I personally do not get why anyone would want to see porn or see another person take their clothes off. I do not get why people will want to do that.

These places scare me, and I don't know why. Maybe it is because I was brought up in a home where we never spoke about sex. We never talk about relationships or anything romantic. I guess this is where my dislike for the industry starts. Of course, I do love the show Girls Next Door, so I guess I am okay with the idea of a porn star, as long as he or she stays clothed and acts normal on camera.

So my project, overcome this fear of porn, or at least become more comfortable with the idea.

If We Stand United Why Do We Fall Divided?

2008-08-26T18:41:00.000-07:00

Okay, so for my Multi Ethic Reporting class we are supposed to write a blog about what we talk about in class. Since I do not know if I can add this blog onto this one or not, I have decided to just write on this until I am told otherwise.

So in our last class we were talking about the importance of accepting other cultures and embracing differences, which on the surface sounds like an after school special. topic. Of course, out of the idea of racism came about the fear of differences, and honestly I think that this fear is a result of our own doing. In fact, fearing others is what this country was founded on, hell for worse or for better we are a country of racist.

What do John Smith and the rest of the Virginia colonist have in common with the p ilgrims? And no, it's not that one landed on a rock that no one cares about and one landed on the coast that people travel to on their own free will.
Honestly, how many of us have visited Plymouth rock, and how many of us enjoyed it?
Both groups ran into Indians when they came to this country and both were afraid of them. Despite what we hear on Thanksgiving the first Americans looked down to the natives and did not see them as their equals. Both groups essentially exchanged small pox infested blankets with the Indians for land and food. And while we have apologized for it, Indians remain the minority group with the highest numbers in teen pregnancy, alcoholism and drug abuse in many areas around the country. Think about we, I just referred to the people who were living here before the first settlers came as a minority group! And then there are the sterotypes that Indians are lazy people, who all use their magical money dances to steal all your money in their casinos as a form of revenge.
I guess no one can admit that they may just suck at poker and gambling away your child's college fund may not be a good idea.

And the same thing happened to the Irish, Italians, Africans, women, gays, Hispanic, Chinese, Japanese and more recently Middle Easterners, along with nearly every other group in this country. America is racist, and that is the reality of it and it is not right. This whole tradition of racism needs to stop. I think that we are advance enough to leave our history of hate behind us, and since almost every group has been discriminated against, we should know better than to discriminate agisnt others.

But this is not just an American problem. I think that white people get a lot of blame for being racist when in reality minorities are often more racist than anyone. Come on, we can get away with saying ethnic jokes and we get away with it! I think as a nation we need to look at ourselves and say "I am a little racist but I will no longer be afraid of coming forward and talking about it. I will learn about different cultures and learn that people are people." People are like that box of chocolates some are really good and some are so awful you wonder why they were made and if anyone likes them.

But until then, I think the writers, actors and puppets of Avenue Q said it best when they said that Everyone's A Little Bit Racist.

lair, lair if we're keeping score, we're all chior boys are best interested and arrogant.

2008-08-26T06:20:00.000-07:00

I am the worlds worst lair, and since I told one today, actually within ten mintues of waking up, I feel that I need to confess my sin.

Here it goes:
Forgive me father, or in this case readers, it has been a few weeks since my last confession. I told the person I am interning for I could not come in today because of school, but I really have a story to do for the newspaper. I didn't mean to lie. I just had because I haven't had a story in a while and figure if I do one now more is to come.

Response: Two hail Marys?

First Comes Heavy Breathing...

2008-08-24T21:52:00.000-07:00

It has to be that time of year again, I just know it is.
I cannot breathe half the time, my face is burning, I can feel myself turning 22423423 shades of red and I cannot sleep because I just keep worrying. And I know why. It happens at the start of every semester, I get scared.

No, forget that, I lose all sense of sanity and lose every ounce of logic that I have ever had within me. I just cannot help but worry what is going to happen to be when I start classes tomorrow. I feel like I am back in the first grade, not knowing any English, sitting in the front of the room and wondering how all the kids in class are so smart while I have no idea what is going on, and this happens at the start of every new school year. It's sad, I know.

Only now that I am in college my worry has gotten worse. I am not only concerned about what is going to happen the first day of school but the rest of my life as well. I have two years until I am done with college. I could have been done in a year but I decided to extend my stay at FIU. All I keep thinking is what am I going to do with my life when this is all done, and yes this has added to my worrying enough to keep me up at night. In two short years, I need to pick what I am going to do, go to grad school or get a job? I don't even know how to do either of those things, they never taught me and again, how do you know which one to do. I feel lost.

I know what I want out of my life, I have always known what I want the outcome to be, but I have no idea how to get there. It's actually really funny, they raise us with these phrases like, reach for your dreams and you can do whatever you want if you work hard enough. This advice does motivate people, including me, to aspire to certain goals, but it doesn't tell us how to get there. I guess this is partly due to the fact that there is not one answer to all the worlds problems.

As childlike as this is going to sound I honestly think that making choices is one of the hardest things to do in life, no really Paradise we all know that. How do we know if we are making the right ones and what will truly make us happy in the end if there is always that what is. Hey worriers like me think about stuff like that, get over it. Maybe I am making a bigger deal of all this than I should, I worry a lot. I know I do. And who knows maybe my neurotic nerves will help me onto finding what I am looking for.

All that is clear to be right now is that it is 1:25 a.m. and I am still awake worry about something that will work out in the end. I know in less than 12 hours I will be sitting in a classroom wondering why I was ever sitting on my bed worrying about stuff like this.

All I Know Is You Look Good In My Shirt...

2008-08-19T20:25:00.001-07:00

Okay, when did 19 become the age when all your friends get married?
I don't get it!

I feel like I should be married by now and thinking about filing for divorce.

By The Way...

2008-08-15T11:28:00.000-07:00

The first thing I am doing when I get back to Florida, after I sleep of course, is going to be beach! I have not seen a palm tree in forever and I think I forgot what the sound of waves crashing on the shore. Then again it is nice seeing little Christmas trees everywhere.

Last night we went to a Greek Fest, which of course made me miss Miami more. I just don't think that it is socially acceptable to eat Greek food and not have an ocean near by. It's just wrong, I am sure there is a law about it somewhere, just look it up.

:0(

*home sick a little

I did however see something yesterday that reminded me of Miami. We were driving in downtown Ottawa and I see this sign that says "VIVA CUBA!" on it. I should have taken a picture of it, oh well.

for purple mountains....

2008-08-15T11:20:00.000-07:00

Hey ya'll,
I am so sorry I am slow in posting on this, the Internet is a little slow here in Canada.
Today is my last full day here, and I am back to the hotness of Florida. Can you believe it is 65 here! And their idea of rain, if you want to call it that, are our sun showers, oh to be Canadian.

Tonight we are off to a county fair, then to drink bubble tea, after we are off to the casino. I still have not bought any ketchup chips but I promise I will soon.
I cannot believe I am out of here so quickly. My flight leaves at 2p.m. tomorrow and I don't land in Florida until 1 a.m. Did I get the worst flight ever? I think I did!!

Sending some Canadian love!

in white houses....

2008-08-10T20:53:00.000-07:00

Hey ya'll...
So while I am in Canada there will be one major change to this blog and that is there will be no links or pictures added to it. WHY? Because it takes forever for me to load one page on the computers here due to the low speed Internet, that's why.

Anywho, that is really the only thing I can complain about here in Canada, not bad eh? I have not really watched TV at all since I have been here, sorry I still cannot report how the news is here, and I have not used my cell phone once. No text messages, no checking my e-mail a million times a day, no phone calls at random times. I finally have quite in a place where everyone is still attached to those things. I love it!!

My new goal while I am here though is to buy liquor and do so legally! The legal age to drink in this provience is 19, a good age when you think about it because I feel 18 is much to young. I really wanna buy something while I am here simply because I cannot do it for another year and a few months back in America. I still feel kind of like I am cheating the system if I buy wine or something, ha I will drink in public and do so under 21! (take that!)

I do not have a camera here but I am using my cousins, so there will be photos when I get back to the states. :0)

Oh Canada, My Home and Native Land...

2008-08-08T10:42:00.000-07:00

Hello ya'll and greetings from Canadaland!
Okay, so that is not the offical name of the country but that does not mean that I cannot call it that. I just got in Canada yesterday and after delayed flights and trying to figure out why we have to pay for drinks of a plane I have can honestly say that travling is not for the light at heart.
I am writings this blog on my cousins computer and to be honest it feels so weird to write in a differnt location and on a differnt copmputer than I am used to. I know this sounds weird but every laptop has a feel to it, and while the keys are always in the same place the way that the spirit of each computer is differnt. It sounds crazy I know but I swear it is true, luckliy this one has a good vide to it.
So far I am trying to get over how odd it is to be watching Canadian TV. Why? Because shows that are traditionally on ABC, such as Greek or Punk'd which is normally on MTV are both on the same network here. In fact Are You Smarter Than a 5TH Grader is called Are You Smarter Than a Canadian 5th Grader maybe it is silly but I find it funny. From a media standpoint, there are a lot more commericals for radio stations here, which I love because I do not think people are exposed to good shows anymore. Also a lot of the commericals have a lot to do with human rights and equality, something that I think we need more of in the states. There is a sense of unity in Candaian TV that we do not get in the states. Why am I talking about commericals, well because they feed to the taste of a nation, state and or community. To understand a countries ads and news, which I have yet to read or watch yet, you can get a sense of what the people in this country find important and what the culture is all about.

Nothing else too exciting to report yet but I promise I will yet ya'll updated on my trip.
Missing ya'll so much!

Is he a superhero or just a hero?

2008-08-01T20:14:00.001-07:00

Batman in my opinion is not a superhero. he is a hero but does not have super quailities about him.
he does not fly
see through wall
turn into fire
or become a hero against his will, he never had to deicide if he was good or evil and if he wanted to be a hero.
he woke up one day and wanted to do it, he is a rich man with time on his hands and money to burn.
Think about it people never pick really rich when asked what superpower they want to have.

*The reason this is not with the blog below is that my phone won't let me.

But He Sucked As Batman

2008-08-01T20:14:00.000-07:00

Okay so I am currently sitting in the movies watching Dark Knight for the second time against my will.
* My grammar maybe horrid in this because I am typing on my cell phone.
As I am sitting here watching I think I figured out why I am not as crazy for this movie as everyone else is. It is not because this movie is poorly made, it is a solid movie. Well kind of, I like the fact that this movie shows the fight between good and evil and does so in a modern manner. I love the connection with the war on terror "play the hero long enough to become the villian."
The acting for the most part is decent but there is something missing.
Christian Baole, as good as he may look, does not give me the batman vibe. The only reason to watch this movie is Heath.

but no, that is not the reason something does not sit well...
I can let the acting go and the inconsisanities with international realtions.
The reason it doesn't sit well is that something gets lost in the story telling. There is no connection, we do not get into their lives and understand the characters, they lack development everything just happens.
yes this is a superhero movie, but look at spiderman, you cared about him watching that movie because he was relateable. you understood your hero. and it did not matter if you missed one of the movies, you got into it and understood he did what he did.
I have seen Dark Knight twice and I still don't feel the connection, nor do I think that this movie warrents a second viewing,hence why I am blogging during the movie instead of watching it.
This movie is not like Tiainic where you watch it a million times and are still in love with it and feel something everytime. No this is the movie you watch once, understand why the war on terror is a lose lose situation and move on.
That is all.

Don't get me wrong this is a good movie, but not one that I would say is welcoming to non superhero fans such as myself.

oooo and speaking of superheros, is batman really a superhero?

What's That Rule That You Live By?

2008-07-29T12:01:00.000-07:00

Forgive me readers for I have sinned, I has been over two weeks since my last posting.
Side Note:How many hail Mary's do I owe you for this one?
Anyway, so what is new in the life of Paradise? The answer: nothing really!
I know odd because it has been so long but honestly with school and work it is hard to find drama of ones own. Sadly I am left working off the lives of others, who are often more fun than your own.

Oh! But I have been a but counterproductive!
I have lost a best friend (not death, someone decided friendship no longer has any meaning... and really who can blame her?), broken my toilet, broken the breaks on my car, lost a little self-esteem but gained it back and realized why I am single... wow maybe there has been a lot going on!

(at work right now posting this now, adding more when I get home)

Okay,But It Still Smells Like Eggs!

2008-07-11T20:17:00.000-07:00

WARNING: Do not let the title of this post fool you, it really has very little to do with eggs... although they do play a part.

For the 1000th time in my lifetime I broke my cell phone this week! I actually broke it twice in one day, yes I am that good. Unlike the times I have broken my phone before this time I will admit that it breaking was my fault. The first time it broke I dropped my phone into a cup of putting I had in my car, yes I had an open cup of pudding in the car... don't hate, and if you are Bill Cosby just be happy I was eating pudding.
Pop Culture: Bill used to do Jell-O pudding commercials where he would say silly things like, "you got to eat the pudding."
So I brought the phone over to the good people at Sprint and within an hour they fixed it. YAY! But on my way home I had the phone in my car where I spilled water on it making it die for the second time. I told you I am amazing at breaking things!

As a result of all of this I spent my entire day yesterday at the Spring store in Pembroke Pines waiting for my phone. They could not fix it but they did give me a new phone and a free memory card, score! I now have a new cell and although I wish I would have asked the guy to save my texts and pictures I have promised myself that I am never going to break my phone again... well at least for another week...

Oh but Paradise you promised us eggs.

While I was waiting for my phone I went over to Starbucks and had one of their fairly new egg sandwiches. I had the eggs Florentine, which is actually really good! It's eggs, cheese and spinach all on a massive toasted English muffin, for only $2.95 and tax, and I am told like 300 something calories, GOOD DEAL! (okay a little high for breakfast but for lunch it is perfect and filling). Just think of it this way, if you go to McDolands in the morning you can get a McMuffin for buck, but lets face it the thing is little, is not very filling and packs just as many calories for one of those hockey puck sized things. From now on I am only getting my breakfast at Starbucks when I want something hot. The best part is, I can get my favorite breakfast food anytime I want at Starbucks, unlike McDonalds who will stop selling me breakfast at 10:30, or is it 11, either way I cannot get it anytime I want. Honestly who are they to tell me when I can have eggs?
As of now the score in the capitalism wars are as follows:
coffee chain one, fast food chain zero!

Just Like Mom Used to Buy!

2008-07-09T20:38:00.000-07:00

So today I went over to BK for lunch, normally I get a veggie burger when I go there but this time I came across an odd item on the menu that I felt that I had to share. They are now serving Kraft Mac Cheese and, here is the kicker, they also have apple slices that look like French fries. HOW WEIRD!

Now while this may sound like a good idea in theory, what could go wrong? According to the box the mac cheese is only 180 calories and an apple pack that is 25 calories. Add that with a bottle of water to drink and you or your kid has a low cal lunch... no more overweight kids... YAY!

The downside to this all... the taste! The mac cheese, which comes from a container that Kraft specialized for BK, is simply frozen and microwavable, does not leave much to the palette. For my taste it is crying out for some pepper, but then again I have a thing for peppery foods and twists on traditional. I am sure any 5-year- old will love the mac cheese so I am going to say that for the market they are targeting they totally score big.

But the apples, do not fair as well. The idea of apples that are cut to look like fires are a great idea, they are more kid friendly and due to their shape and color look like unhooked potatoes. The downside is that these pre-packaged lunches, they lack the crunch that we normally associate with fresh fruit. It is really upsetting eating these and I never thought I would EVER say that I felt fruit needed something to be dipped in to taste good, but here we are. The people at BK give caramel packages with these apples and please... USE THEM! Also they market these apples, that are shaped like fries like I have mentioned a million times before, in the containers that they typically put French fries on, yet when you order it you get a plastic baggie... NOT COOL!

I was honestly really excited when I heard about these items but they were kind of a let down when I went for it. I think it came about with good intent but there is something odd about going out to get food that you can easily make at home... no joke the food is just Kraft Easy Mac, and if I had kids I would much rather feed them fresh fruit than pre-packed ones. Moreover, I am at a place called Burger King, it just does not feel right to go there for pasta. But then again this would not be the first time the chain went away form burgers, remember a few years ago when they had tacos on their dollar menu?

Eating this lunch lead me to think why these fast food places do not put salads or veggie burgers on their kids menus. If their true intent is to provide kids with healthy choices, then they would do so by giving them choices that do not involve cheese, carbs and caramel.

The mac cheese and apples are currently only in a few test markets, so if they are in yours go for it and give it a try... what do you have to lose?

Let Freedom Ring!!

2008-07-03T22:35:00.001-07:00

Today is Independence Day!
Well actually it has been for about an hour and a half now.
I have never been as thrilled to celebrate this holiday as I am this year. First of all, last year I did not get to celebrate the day at all... I had an exam the next day so I had to stay in all day and study, I even missed the Nathans Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest! Oddly enough though I was studying for an exam in U.S. Military History.
This Fourth is also special to me because my cousin is FINALLY home from Iraq this year. After serving active duty over there he can now celebrate our independence safe at home. Of course I still have a few friends over in Iraq, Afghanistan and other countries that make celebrating even more special.

I think people often get the wrong idea of the Fourth of July, this is not a day just light fire works, and have a huge bbq with friends. Of course those things are wonderful days to celebrate the day, and have tradition behind them, today is a day to reflect on what it means to be an American and to be proud of the country we live in, with all of its beauty and ugliness. Maybe it's because of the military history class I took last summer that prevented me from taking part in the activities that made me see the importance of this day. The kids, yes kids as young as 14, who fought in the Revolutionary War so we can have this country. For the people who went against the British because they believed that America could be someday be among the greatest nations on earth. The men who died during the civil war to bring this great nation together and the families that were torn apart from it.

This country has a rich history of hard working, regular people who fight for what they believe in. So today as you are watching those fireworks and eating your hotdogs, think of all those men and women who died for this country. This of the men who rebelled against the British in order to give us the right to have a country and heck to give me the freedom to write this blog.

Good Bless America... from sea to shining sea.

ps. If this is coming off overly patriotic there is a reason for it. I am sick of people who say they don't care of this day. This is your countries independence were taking about, be proud of it! People risk their lives to come to this country and for the chance to be an American, don't take it for granted. People have died for your independence and are always fighting for your freedom, don't disrespect them by saying that today means nothing to you.

It's the End of the World as We Know It..

2008-07-02T11:50:00.000-07:00

Who said that life never feels like a sitcom? Or in the case of current event, life feels more like a sci-fi show.

Somewhere near Geniva they have been working on this particle acceleator called the Large Hadron Collider (LHC). Sounds all fancy right? It also sounds like the biggest sci-fi comes to life intrument ever! Not only is the center about 100m underground on it, turning it on could end the world... feel like the aliens should come in soon? yeah me two.

The machine is supposed to allow us to discover new dimentions, and gain a better understanding of the world around us. We currently know of only three dimentions, and if Stargate SG1 is correct, there should be about 11 more out there for us to see. (of course on the show they have already discovered all of them. It sounds like no big deal that they would even consider turning this thing on right? So we learn more about the world and how it works, la de da. But this is the part when the situation becomes more sci-fi like: although those working on the LHC say that it is safe and will be benefical, they also have said if they do turn it on, as they plan on next month, it could distory the world. OH JOY!

Although the odds of the world ending when someone turns on the massive machine are low, it can still happen.

Since I am no physicist, nor do I play one on TV, I am going to allow the European Center for Nuclear Research to fo it for me.

"It is a particle accelerator used by physicists to study the smallest known particles – the fundamental building blocks of all things. It will revolutionise our understanding, from the miniscule world deep within atoms to the vastness of the Universe.
Two beams of subatomic particles called 'hadrons' – either protons or lead ions – will travel in opposite directions inside the circular accelerator, gaining energy with every lap. Physicists will use the LHC to recreate the conditions just after the Big Bang, by colliding the two beams head-on at very high energy. Teams of physicists from around the world will analyse the particles created in the collisions using special detectors in a number of experiments dedicated to the LHC."

So good luck all in case they turn this thing on... I know everything will honestly be okay, but come on thinking that they can make something like this only makes one wonder about what else could happen. (ooo the times in which we live...)

By the way, does the photo I have on this post is of the LHC itself. The thing is about six stories, so don't let picture size fool you.

Some People Change....

2008-06-30T21:43:00.000-07:00

So this morning I am taking part in my ritual of listening to Evil Durdan and the Y-Morning Zoo, or z-morning news depending where you live, and they mentioned a story that I feel needs to be shared.
Apparently women who are bi-lingual tend to change their personalities based on which language they are speaking! HOW WEIRD!
They mostly spoke of Hispanic women, and how they tend to be more assertive when they speak Spanish rather than when they speak English. I do not doubt this, but I don't speak Spanish, and I find it funny that Farsi has the opposite effect. I am more passive when I speak it and not nearly as sarcastic.

I find this all funny. It makes sense that we would change the way we speak based on the culture that language comes from, but I to change personalities based on what your speaking? Now that is some cool mind trick that I love!

In These Times In Which We Live...

2008-06-27T21:14:00.001-07:00

So the Miami Herald began offering people buyouts last week, and I just got the worst e-mail I could possibly get as a result. My editor, Hamal, is taking the buyout and leaving the newspaper.
I cannot stop crying about this!

He is a brilliant editor and probably the nicest person I have ever met in the field, with more talent than anyone should have. He was the kind of editor who cared enough to explain details, he wanted his reporters to become better writers and I really hope I did him justice.

Whoever replaces him has some big shoes to fill... he is one in a billion, no one else would have taken a chance on me, but he did last year. He saw me working one day with another reporter and asked me to freelance for him. He taught me so much, and it hurts to know that such a wonderful mentor is now gone.

If people want to know why journalism is not doing well, it is because newspaper are allowing people like my editor to leave the industry! People who know what they are doing and have the experince to make a section great. I understand the economy is suffering and that everyone is trying to pitch a penny, so to speak, but this is too much. Making reporters buyout of their jobs should be a crime in my eyes because it goes against democracy and everything we stand for as Americans. How is a free press supposed to continue when they are forced to get rid of their best editors and reporters? Journalism is not the kind of job that can easily be done by the lowest bidder; it is a job that takes time to learn and one that is never perfected.

I am still in shock as to how this can happen. As a journalism student it is upsetting to see the best leave, but I am thankful enough to know that I was lucky enough to work with one of the greatest.

It Was 1980 Something In The World I Grew Up In...

2008-06-25T22:39:00.000-07:00

When VH1 wanted me to lo ve the 70's a few years ago, I was all for it! I was born in 88 this show was my way of seeing how life was like years before I was alive. That and I played with half the toys mentioned on that show so it was nice to see when they started!
The same goes for I love the 80's and 90's each part of that series was my guilty pleasure, but now I feel that VH1 has gone too far with there new decade that they tell me to love....
I LOVE THE MILLENNIUM
This gem of bad TV goes through the past eight years in eight parts. Honestly, is it legal to even have a I Love The any decade without the decade being over? As much as I want to hate the fact that I have to relive the past eight years, something draws me in. I cannot help it! I need rehab!
There is something about Hal Sparks and Micheal Ian Black that make me happy and make this show worth watching. Also because the people on this show really need the whole I Love The series to have any kind of career.
Indeed, I Love The Millennium is allowing me to relive the past eight years, all of which I remember very well and be able to fill in all of the blanks. I guess the good people at VH1 realized their fan-base.
From crony lines from broke back mountain like, "I wish I knew how to quit you," and every trend and gadget that we all had to have this show is sooooo worth it! like o-m-g do you remember when the iPod came out? Even Bushisms are not safe in this show!

So please, relive the last few years with me and enjoy it! Just laugh at the madness and be thankful that we can go through all the stuff you wish you could see again. My favorite part of the 90's by the way and the new millennium in the first part of it anyways, VH1 was just for older people and would do true to life music shows like Behind the Music. Those were the days...

2008-06-03T20:53:00.000-07:00

Okay so I LOVE LOVE LOVE the Colbert Report! It makes me smile and don't deny it makes you giggle as well. In the words of Stephen Colbert... well not really but he would say it... it is UN-AMERICAN not to love his show!
So one of the things he has on his show is putting people or things or ideas... really any noun or verb, on "notice." I found a web site that lets you make your own notice board.
Of couese I made my own and I have put the following thins on notice for the following reasons:
1. Bears: (check out the link for this... its funny)you cannot have a notice board without them... in the words of Colbert they want to eat our honey and steal our picnic baskets... NOT COOL!
2. Bad E-Mail Repliers: I hate it when you send someone an email and they do not send anything back. I know they got it and frankly I find it rude. Answer emails people!
3. Hilary Clinton: Give it up, you lost... everyone knows it, just concede and allow the election to go on. (link to 20 reasons why she sucks!)
4. Starbucks: I love their coffee, tea and lattes... oh and just about everything they make, but I am mad at them for becoming the only socially acceptable place to met people you don't want to talk to for very long.
5. Mr. AOL Poll Maker: Those polls are always weird! They just called Toy Story the best animated movie ever made...and put Sherk ahead of Beauty and the Beast! (Okay the link goes to moviefone.com but the link was taken from AOL's homepage, making just as bad. Also AOL always puts up the dumbest polls.
6. Cover Songs: IF YOUR ARE NOT GOING TO MAKE IT BETTER! DON'T TRY IT! I'M LOOKING AT YOU
1. Fiona Apple
2. Jessica Simpson
3. Don't know who did it but the girl who did the remake to "What Hurts the Most" by Rascal Flatts
4. Hilary Duff
5. FALL OUT BOY! (you cannot re-do Beat It unless you are a 40 something year old newly white pop star with race issues!

Good job to Madonna, New Found Glory and Christina Aguilera :0)
7. Business Casual: I just always have a hard time with this and I am sorry but there is some sexism here! If guys can wear jeans so can girls!
8. Late Night Hunger: I hate eating dinner at like 8 and being ready for round two at 11! Not a fattie I promise.

Make your own list! It's fun and I promise more to come soon.

Sending my love and all the best kisses! :0)

I'm Still Learning How To Cry

2008-06-02T18:36:00.000-07:00

I have never cried before in class. due to a story. EVER! In my over 10 years of being in school I have never had a teacher bring me to tears.
Tonight my teacher was telling us about his experience of coming to terms with his race as he was growing up. Every part of the story from how he tried to scrub the dark color off his skin when he was five or six to coming to terms with his race when he was older and at a convention. It all made me cry. It just reminded me of growing up Persian and finding a way to balance it all.

I remembered how much of an outcast I felt like growing up in my hometown. Everyone here is white or Hispanic. I grew up with parents who did not know English very well. I grew up brining exotic Persian food to school for lunch, only to get stairs by my friends so I quickly stopped.

I was always made fun of by my cousins, they called me names for having curly hair, a small nose and being more curvy then they are. I look like an outsider next to my family of lighter skinned, straight hair, no big booty family. I wanted nothing more than to look more like my family when I was growing up.

In fact I grew up just like my teacher, trying to rub the dark out of my skin and trying to lighten my hair. I even grew up being called Paradise, yes it was mostly due to the fact that people cannot pronounce Pardis, but also because Paradise seemed more normal to me.

I grew up feeling like I was living two lives. I was Paradise out side my house and I refused to allow anyone in my family to call me Paradise as well... and my friends could not use Pardis.I kept my worlds apart. I would act "normal" in public and shed every ounce of Persian in me. Then I would go home to a place where I would not speak English, listen to music that was fun to dance to, a close family and on special days I would celebrate holidays that were culturally rich.

Sadly 9/11 made me Persian. I could not hide my culture anymore and for worse or for better I was forced to embrace my used to be secret life. I was forced to loosen up. I remember going to work one day and my boss called me Pardis and I went off on him telling him that he was not allowed to do that. FAMILY ONLY!

I am so glad that I no longer feel that way. Just as I opened my culture to the general public years latter I finished the process by opening up my name. It happened my sophomore year of college when I went to a party with a friend of mine. I was talking to this guy who used to have a Persian girlfriend, and he told me that I should not hide Pardis from people when I told him what Paradise meant in Farsi. He then called me Pardis for the rest of the time I was at the party.

From then on I embarrassed my name. And after this class I finally know that I am not the only one who once sat there on their bathroom floor wishing to look like everyone else and wishing to be like everyone else

( Sorry stereotype maker man... no face covers in Iran)

(My kingdom background)

(Persian food is amazing!)

I Ain't No Holla Back Girl...

2008-06-02T13:23:00.000-07:00

Hey ya'll...

okay so just now I am walking into the book store to get food. Since I get no service in the newspaper room at school I am checking a few texts on my way over... so I am in la la land and I see these two tall boys, who are dressed a little hoody, walking to the door too.. and one of them says something and opens the door. I say thank you and keep going...

that's when things became weird...

he very angrily stomped his foot on the ground and said... GIRL I AIN'T TYRING TO HOLLA AT YOU I WAS JUST ASKING WHERE I CAN GET SOME CIGS!?!

I told him sorry because I did not know he was talking to me, I mean honestly you see two people together, you think they are talking together. I do at least! Oh by the way I dont know where they sell cigs at school so i was the wrong person to ask.

I mean honestly I do not think I am in some bad Gwen Staffini Video. I do not want people to "holla" at me. In fact I hate it! It makes me feel cheap and little when guys say stuff when I walk by.

But that whole line he said has got me to think about how it feels to be a guy. Living in Miami I hate walking to most places because guys will ALWAYS say things when you walk by. I honestly expect it now. Thus I always ignore them. But I never thought about it from their point of view...

like for the good guys who just want to ask for the time without any bad intentions. The one who really wants to know where to best place to get coffee is and the one who honestly wants to tell you that you look cute. It has to be harder to be a guy these days because girls now think whatever guys say to us walking by is a pick up line.

really sad right!

It must be hard, because my honest mistake is the result of years of comments being shouted at me as I walk by. My lesson... listen more when walking.

(i guess i ain't no hollah back girl?)

How Often Do You Color?

2008-06-02T10:21:00.001-07:00

I love Sex and the City!
LOVE IT!
LOVE IT!
And this weekend, just like every other girl in this country, I went to the movies with my best friend and her mother and her best friend to take part in the biggest female bonding movie ever made!
Before stepping into the theater I realized how much people like to relate to the characters. I remember when I was seven and watching Power Rangers how we would all pick a character that represented us. I was the yellow ranger.
Then when the Spice Girls were the it band we all picked out which one we would be again, I got to be Mel B, Scary Spice, because I have big hair... no fair because I wanted to be Emma, Baby Spice,(she wore cuter cloths but I was to old to be the baby

So while I am in line to see Sex and the City, for some reason, I was drawn back to my days as a seven-year-old. We actually each picked what characters we wanted to be! My best friend got Carrie, because she likes to write (well i do to but i think Carrie should go to someone with an amazing shoe and dress collection, along with having an ability to write. So she earned that title), her mom got Sam, because of her fun personality and independent spirit, the other women we were with got Miranda. No idea why because I don't know her but whatever.
Then there was me... I guess I am more of the Charlotte.

Which I guess is fitting. I am a little of a prude. I know, did I just admit that... I am breaking some taboo law, but I will not kiss a guy unless I have feelings for them, I will admit that I am a little naive at times and as much as I will deny this til I am at my bitter end, I would love to live that fairy tale life that she had made for herself. (only I would work).

If there is one thing that Sex and the City does is bring out selves to our own attention. Yes, I am a little like each character, but I am happy with Charlotte!

I just find it funny what powers this movie has. It has made women of all ages bond over content, brought us all out to the movies for a national girls night out and brought us all to a time in our childhood where you'd calm a character.

I Live For Little Moments Like That...

2008-05-28T20:46:00.000-07:00

Okay I have realized something about myself.
(Paradise moment coming up... everyone get ready!)
I have realized that I LOVE REALITY TV!!
no really Paradise everyone does.... but I think I finally realized why!
I honestly am not a fan of watching shows with normal people... honestly if I wanted to see average people living dramatic lives I can just ask them for more details about their lives. I just love... and I mean LOVE watching celebrities. Yes I am one of those people who will follow the lives of the rich and famous... no wait... I don't care what Paris Hilton is doing today,and after watching it once I forgot that Britney had a show of her own for a while... I enjoy watching B list stars..even C!
HOW DO YOU NOT LOVE THIS!!!
There is something fun about watching the Playboy Bunnies and Kim Kardashian. It is just the people that are not there yet, but are trying so hard. Its a look into the life style of the rich and famous and come on... we dont get enough B list in our lives and I want MORE!

My new love! And THANK YOU E CHANNEL FOR BRINING THIS TO ME! Lindsey Lohen's Sisters show!!! (dont ask what its called... like i know!) I just find it funny how they are going to bitch that they do not have any private life and then go ahead and make a reality show. This show follows Ali (the sister) journey to be a pop start... little sister wanting to follow in the foot steps of a big sister through a reality show.... ASHLEE SIMPSON YOU FINALLY HAVE A ROLE MODEL!!! (score... hey at least she has one...does she know their sisters hate each other?)

Sorry but after watching this... it is clear that she just wants to follow in her sisters steps and be famous too... in her case maybe little to no talent will do it. The best part of the show... first episode anyway she proclaims her love for hip-hop as if it is a new fad... WAY NOT TO LOOK RACIST HONEY!!!
This show only probes two things:
1. Celebs are just as obsessed with their lives as the average person is, maybe more so ie: Lohans mom looking at EVERY tabloid every morning.
2. As long as they want to put their live on shows for me to see I will not feel bad for watching.

LOVE B LIST DRAMA!! LOVE IT!

Should've Said No

2008-05-21T12:59:00.001-07:00

I am a huge Taylor Swift fan, she is the reason why I got into country music, well one of them, but her performance at the ACM's was something to laugh at. I love the song Should Have Said No, and she did a good job singing it live, but what I find funny about it is how she managed to use EVERY corny on stage performance cliche.
She starts with the emo look with the guitar, looking down like every other ballad, I guess this was to show how she can play guitar and to show how emotional she gets about music. Then she gets up, and sings at a mic, then getting her baggie cloths ripped off of her to show off a cute black dress: BRITNEY SPEARS 1999 VMA ANYONE??????
Then she goes ahead and does the corniest thing of all...SHE GETS WET! singing under a wall of rain water.

This whole thing makes me laugh because it shows how much signers have to do in order to be noticed in the music industry. Honestly Taylor has an amazing voice, and on a personal note if I could get my curls to look like hers I would be thrilled, but I wish she would have just sang her song.
How much better is she without the running around getting her cloths ripped off and wet...

please you be the judge!

West Virgina... Country Mama!!

2008-05-14T20:03:00.000-07:00

So Clinton, who I "love," so much won in West Virgina last night. Big SHOCK! I hate to refer to the Daily Show about this, no wait I don't, but they were showing clips of the interviews in the state and people STILL think that Obama is Muslim, his middle name bothers them and THEY DONT LIKE HIM BECAUSE HE IS BLACK AND THAT SCARES THEM. One even saying, "I am scared of members of the other race."
This is why people think people from the south are so far behind. The rest of the country knows that Obama is NOT a Muslim and if you are dumb enough to let a middle name and race effect who you vote for.... please don't vote democracy was not made for you.

Reason number 3243423 why I don't like Clinton, because of her I have lost respect for a whole state!

Not Being Re-Electable Does NOT Mean That Mannars Should Be Lost!

2008-05-10T20:54:00.000-07:00

Recently Hilary Clinton said a few remarks about Obama that some feel were wrong to say the least. She said that he could not win the votes of hard working white people or ones that have not finished college. You know I was outraged by this at first but then I began to think more about it. If whites who have not finished college are voting for Clinton doesn't that mean that only the smart ones who finished are voting for Clinton?
And honestly Clinton clearly knows nothing about hard work. It still bugs me to think that only lazy white people like Obama in her eyes, but then again, when these hard working people hear these comments I am sure their votes will change too.
It is so funny how my view of this family has changed so much this year.
Bill Clinton used to be one of my favorite presidents, next to FDR and Lincoln I was in love with him as a person and policies as well. I felt he knew how to talk to the American people as if we were adults. But as this campaign is showing, he is just as bad as his wife, maybe even worse because anyone with eyes can see how fake Hilary is, but Bill... that was a shock!
I am talking, of course, about the new tape that was released of Bill yelling at a women who speaks out against the fact that Bill promised health care reform but never came through. Now yes, Bill did have good points as to why the policy was never enforced but that is not what upsets me here. What makes me upset is that a former president of THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA thinks it is okay to lash out at someone in the coward and speaks to her in a very rude way. I know as a "liberal" I am supposed to hate McCain but honestly, at least that man will listen to others when they go against him. And don't get me started on Obama! That poor man has had more people go against everything he stands for than anyone this season, yet he never snaps. But I guess it is a sin to ever go against a Clinton... heaven forbid anyone goes against the first family of bad politics and worse ethics.

Never Seen Anyone As Cold As You...

2008-05-10T20:38:00.000-07:00

I hate to think of myself as bitter or unwilling to open up to the subject of love, marriage and everything that comes with the topic. I honestly do not even enjoy entertaining the idea of love because it is a scary one to think about. How can anyone feel something without knowing what it is, especially if you have a skewed image of it in the first place? Honestly, my idea of love comes mostly from the opening monologue in the movie High Fidelity. In it the main character speaks of the pop culture image of love and how it has redefined the way generations of people view the subject. Are we all hopeless romantics with fairy tale ideas of love because we want to be, or is it because we have been feed endless amounts of hopeless love songs and movies that we just do not know any better? We all grow up listening to hundreds of songs about heart break, love, pain and loss, and yet, many can still is the silver lining and still believe that the right person is out there. Most people still want nothing more than to live their own love songs and define their own happily ever after.
I know I am overly cynical but maybe the problem with love is not how hard it is to find it, but how as a culture we all grow up with overly romantic ideas of prince charming coming and sweeping us all off our feet, and, of course, living happily ever after. In reality not many people experience this without going through a lot of pain and heart break as well. That is the part of love that people are not willing to accept. People refuse to believe that they will fight with a significant other, they will disagree and that happily ever after may include a few days of not being able to stand one other.
I am not going to blame pop culture for my views on love because they are not fully to blame. I admit it, I bare just as much guilt as Meg Ryan does for making me obsess over late night talk radio after she made Sleepless In Seattle. Who knows maybe I was truly in love with my first crush, Josh, in the first grade. I remember how unbelievably cute I thought he was back then, and how upset I was when I had to move at the end of the school year. I never told him that I liked but looking back I still find it hard to believe that a first grader can be that infatuated by another person. The again I could have been in love years latter when I graduated high school. I cannot begin to explain how infatuated I was by my first boyfriend and how I did fall into the fairy tale idea for a small amount of time, because I truly believed that it was my happily ever after. Then we broke up about a year latter, and I was left with the side of love I avoided my whole life, the pain and heartbreak. Maybe wallowing over someone is just another step in the road to finding love.
Even with my own experiences, there is one thing that always stops me from being one of those heartless people who are closed to everyone in their lives. That is this note that I found on the bus ride home my sophomore year of high school. It was from a boy who drew a picture of himself and the girl the liked playing on a playground with the words, ‘I love you, call me,’ written on top of the page. Judging my the drawing I assumed that the little boy who wrote this was in elementary school, and probably in the third grade at the oldest. I felt that the bottom of a school bus was no place for a note that sweet so I decided not to do the honorable thing and return it to the bus driver. Instead I took the drawing home where it has a new home in the top right hand drawer of my desk.
The reason why I was drawn to the drawing made by that little boy, and still am to this day, is because it shows romantic love at its most perfect stage. Untouched by media ideas of heartbreak and unknowing of the pain that having strong emotions towards another person can cause. There was little or no pop culture influence that made that little boy draw that picture. It was simply because he acted on his emotions and decided to tell the girl he liked how he felt, something that I was never able to do with that little boy from my childhood.
I continue to believe that romantic comedies and pop songs about love and pain have a lot to do with the feelings that people have about love and the way they view it. I continue to think that girls will forever look for their prince charming and boys will forever try to play that role. Yet, I also think that admits of this fabrication love can be a powerful experience of the lessons from those movies and songs are taken to heart. If the lessons of forgiveness and moving on are understood by the viewer then maybe a person like me who runs away from the idea of love, can think about the subject long enough to embrace it and bring it into practice.

It's So Amazing How People Think They Are So In Love When It's The First Person That They Have Ever Been With...

2008-05-08T17:05:00.000-07:00

Today was a real eye opener to me when it comes to relationships and what it truly means to be in love with another person. My friend Cynthia and I began talking about relationships and how it seems that there are two different kinds of girls when it comes to the topic. The girls who have an overly romantic idea of relationships, and those who see things in a more realistic light.
Those girls who see things more romantic tend to want to be married within a an hour of having a boyfriend while the more real people... well they are smart enough to see the things the way they are.
The problem with this is that while in college I think that being in a relationship is different simply because you are in that in between stage. In high school being with a person means having a romantic idea of everything and the main goal of it all is to last to college. After college dating is just for marriage really. But in college you do it for both fun and marriage. In college being with a person is different because you are trying to find yourself just as much as the other person is.
As my friend and I are dicussing this we realized that it is generally at the year and a half mark that problems tend to occur with people our age. That is when the changes tend to take the better of people. It is amazing how it works.
Maybe this is why I am still single, I do not want to deal with this relationship drama. I know I am still in the stage in my life when I am trying to find who I am as a person, and find what I should do with my life. I refuse to help someone else look for themselves and to be a buffer in that stage.
So good luck to all my college aged peers who are in relationships and are helping someone on their path to self discovery. God knows I do not have the strength for that.

Its all a part of me that's who I am.

2008-05-07T06:40:00.000-07:00

I was just reading an article in the New York Times about Israel that I found to be interesting. If I was not writing this blog on my phone I would have a link posted.
The article was about how Arabs in Israel feel left out and as if they do not blong to the country as a whole. This made me think about what it actually takes to be a citizen of a country. I had to do two blogs in a row about religion but a major reason why Arabs feel left out in Israel because it is defining itself as a Jewish state and they are not Jewish.
This is amazing to me simply because it says what I have been all along. That religion cannot define a country because it will isolate others. Muslim countries make it so that people of Jewish faith or any other are uncomfortable living there and Israel is doing the same thing only with Judaism.
A nation needs to be all inclusive and not see religious lines.There is nothing worse than not feeling a part of the country you are a citizen of.

Lossing My Religion... Then Getting It Back In My Own Way

2008-05-06T20:21:00.000-07:00

I was brought up as a Muslim. I have often said that I am a horrible Muslim because I barley practice it. I am a good person, I do not lie, in fact I cannot lie to save my life. I do not steal and I am friendly to everyone. Heck I even give to every homeless person I see. It has to be a sin to walk by one without dropping at least a dollar. (right?)
Throughout my life I have always been told that I do not know enough about my religion, or lack there of. I used to laugh at this remark because I feel as if I do know about Islam, I have just seen enough of the bad side of religion that I cannot in my own right call myself a member of any faith. I guess when you leave a country for being too religious and then come to one that is becoming more religious it kind of makes the whole idea seem odd.
I am now taking a class on the subject, called Islam in International Relations, and honestly as I am reading more about Islam it is becoming clear to me that I do know more about the religion than what I once thought. It is just that I made the choice not to practice, just like others have made the choice to.
I think that what sets people who do follow a religion apart from those who do not is that those who do are threatened by the fact that someone has made a choice so much different than the one they have. They find it weird that there are people in the world like me who feel that not going to church or any holy place will make me less connected to God. Whom by the way I do believe in.
The problem is that people cannot see the difference between religion and faith. You can have one without the other. I can be a Catholic, and have that religion in my life, go to church, eat the bread and confess my every sin and still not have faith or spirituality. Even Mother Teresa went something like 50 years without feeling God in her life, and I would never say that she had any lack of religion in her life. She was a nun how could she?
The same I think works with faith, maybe I feel this way because it is personal to me but I do not have a strong religious presence in my life, but no one can ever question how much faith I have. I believe in one universal God, I believe that all the prophets did exist and spread a wonderful message of love and unity within their own rights. I believe that everything works in the end. I believe in being a good person to all and I believe that good people do go to heaven. I do not feel that any of those thoughts are bad ones;however, I find it odd that feelings this way makes me somewhat a bad person in the eyes of those who are religious. Maybe it is because I believe in everything they do... I just do not have a religious title attached to how I feel about life.

Oh What A Shame!

2008-05-03T22:19:00.000-07:00

My love for useless facts has caught up with me once again. I cannot help it I just adore knowing information that I know will not help me anything. So how excited was I went to logged onto AOL today and I saw 6 myths that even your doctor believes, so of course I read this, and since I feel no knowledge should go unshared I am sharing this with all of you that are good enough to read my blog.
Myth One: You should drink at least eight glasses of water a day.
http://www.jonco48.com/blog/water.jpg
http://www.jonco48.com/blog/water.jpg
The truth is actually that it does not matter how much water you drink because the actual study from the 1940s that people use as a reference to this fact said that you should drink 2.5 liters of water but it included FOOD in that as well. So the water from a piece of fruit totally counts. While they say this is not true I am sorry but it maybe a myth but I love drinking water all day. In fact I feel better as I continue to drink it, and while there is no proof I still say that drinking more water makes me feel better about me.
Myth Two: We use only 10 percent of ourhttp://media.bonnint.net/slc/126/12671/1267198.jpg
http://media.bonnint.net/slc/126/12671/1267198.jpg brains.
This one was a shock to me because I have repeated this one over and over to people. There is no proof of anyone not using the other 90 percent that we are told are dormant all the time.
Myth Three: Fingernails and hair grow after death.
We have all been told that our nails and hair grow up to what like three weeks after we die. I never understood this myth but I so bought into it. Well turns out that they do not grow at all but our skin does shrink when we die thus making it appear that our hair and nails have grown. So our eyes are just playing tricks on us, meanies.
Myth Four
Shaved hair grows back faster, coarser and darker.http://www.cosmogirl.com/cm/cosmogirl/images/leg-shaving-med.jpg
http://www.cosmogirl.com/cm/cosmogirl/images/leg-shaving-med.jpg
How many times have your shaved and heard this myth being told. I wax solely because I have been told shaving makes the hair grow thicker and darker. The real reason it appears that way is because the new hair has not hit the sun yet, and thus looks darker than the one that was their before.
Myth Five: Reading in dim light ruins your eyesight.
http://www.technovelgy.com/graphics/content06/book-reading-person.jpg
http://www.technovelgy.com/graphics/content06/book-reading-person.jpg
My parents stand by this myth forever, heck someone told my dad that its better to have the light on the left side and he refuses to sit with it on his right now. I knew this was not true. I always read in the dark and I can see perfect up close, far away that's a different story.
Myth Six:Eating turkey makes you drowsy.
http://content.contentthatworks.com/images/recipe_roasted_turkey_with_mushroom_herb_sauce.jpg
http://content.contentthatworks.com/images/recipe_roasted_turkey_with_mushroom_herb_sauce.jpg
This is another fun one. I am a vegetarian but I have always heard that the reason people get tired on Thanksgiving is because of all the tryptophan in the turkey. Turns out there is no more in a turkey than there is in beef and chicken. It is actually pork and cheese that have more and make you want to sleep. So a ham a cheese will have a bigger impact on your sleeplessness than anything. I figure wanting to sleep after thanksgiving is because of eating a lot of everything.

**I honestly think these are fun and interesting but since I love unless facts I wanted to add a few more...
* There is a military myth that taps came about in the civil war from a song in the pocket of a solider during the civil war after fighting his dad. This is NOT true.
* You cannot get pregnant from spree in a pool.
* US Dollar bills are made out of cotton and linen
* On a Canadian two-dollar bill, the American flag is flying over the Parliament Building.
* There are approximately 100 million acts of sexual intercourse each day.
* “101 Dalmatians” and “Peter Pan” are the only Disney animations in which both of a character’s parents are present and don’t die during the movie.
* Rats and horses can’t vomit.
* All polar bears are left-handed
* Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated
* An office desk has 400 times more bacteria than a toilet.
* A person uses approximately fifty-seven sheets of toilet paper each day.
* America's favorite Crayola crayon color is blue.
* According to legend, tea originated in China when tea leaves accidentally blew into a pot of boiling water.

Enjoy!

nothing looks worse

2008-05-02T19:01:00.000-07:00

I will admit I am a fan of Perez Hilton.com. I enjoy his blog, there I said it. And one of the entries yesterday made me very upset. Apparently some music reviewers gave Kanya West a bad review of his concert... a Bt. Well I guess the self loving artist does not think that his concert is a Bt and was insulted enough by it that he postest a blog on his site telling off the reporter and saying how she or he does not respect his art. Honestly, I feel as if it is West that does not have a love and passion for art, if he did je would realize that journalism is an art. Print media, just like movie writing, music and producing, is an art and for any "artist" to bash another ones work and say they do not know art... that is just disrespectful. Any true artist is willing to take critism and learn from it. One person not liking your work does not mean that it is horrible, but no artist and get upset for a persons reaction to their work. That is not what the medium and painful. It is being able to take a few blows. It upsets me when one person cannot take anyone calling their work less than perfect. A true artist reaches for perfection... a lazy one wants everyone to think they've reached it.

The Hardest Part Is Not Finding What We Need To Be...

2008-04-29T15:40:00.000-07:00

It is the same excuse that every artist uses when something happens in their lives does not get a positive public reaction they blame someone else. Miley Cyrus recently posed topless for photos that were taken by Annie Leibovitz for a spread in Vanity Fair. As wrong as it was for her to take photos of a 15 year old girl posing in risque positions, I think the American people as a whole are missing out on the bigger story. Her father was at the shoot with her, and while it maybe easy to fool a 15 year old in taking photos, her father should have stopped the shot from ever being done.
Why is it that the blame is so easily being passed down to the photographer when it is Bill Ray who is to take all the blame for the photos. He should have never been okay with her daughter having topless photos of herself taken. He should have said no and put an end to it. Miley is 15, she is way to young to be in photos that show off her body in anyway, no matter how artsy they are promised to be.
In some of these photos Miley is posing with her father in rather sexy ways that suggest more than a typical father daughter relationship. Being in the public requires protecting an image and if Billy Ray can sit back and allow his daughter to go through this kind of public humiliation at her young age then he is clearly as naive as his daughter.

Billy Ray is not the first father in Hollywood that has gone to far with his daughters. Have we forgotten Joe Simpson? He is constantly in the public eye for going too far with his daughters and not knowing when to say no. These men need to learn that they fathers first and managers second.

Why Doesn't He Love Me?

2008-04-29T00:49:00.000-07:00

It is a little sad. No matter how far along any of us get in life everything comes back to the same thing... does he love me? I read once in the book EAT Pray Love that after natural disasters therapist often continue to get the same reaction from those who survived. This question is "does he love me?" it always about a relationship and as I sit here thinking about what lies ahead for me I cannot help but think just that.
I am graduating college in a year, I would love to be a journalist, but I have no job set. I would like to work for the "New York Times," I would love to go to grad school and get a masters in International Relations. I would like to do so much with my life and yet, whenever I tell people about my dreams they always ask me why there is not a man involved in this plan of mine.
I am single, and I always joke that it will be forever but I think that the real reasoning behind my fear, is that having someone in my life is something extra to be unsure about. I am currently living in a fear that I am not good enough to get a job. I look at my resume, and although long, I am afraid that I am not enough of what I should be at this point in my life. I have passed on my fear of rejection to my job, and I honestly refuse to allow the one thing that is stopping me from opening myself up to any guy be the same factor that stops me from doing what I want with my life.
I want to make great art with my life. I want to touch people with my words and allow my words, my experiences to have an impact on the life of another person. I want to have the power to move people but I am slowly realizing that I cannot in any way impact others the way that I want to unless I can allow my words to impact me and move me into following my dreams.

English Please!

2008-04-25T22:52:00.000-07:00

I am an immigrant to this country!
I may have came when I was young but never the less I was not born here and my parent were not either. Yet one thing that we all did when we came to America was LEARN ENGLISH!
I understand the need to keep a language within a family, I really do. But one thing that I have been noticing is that we have allowed this making this country accepting of all thing to go way to far! We have tests in two languages, we have shampoo bottles in two languages and god knows if I can go anywhere in Miami without having someone speak to me in Spanish before English. Forget the fact that I think these things make people lazy and it is unsafe for people to live in a country when they do not speak the language of the lawmakers.
But now they have ads on ENGLISH speaking networks that are in Spanish!ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? no really are you? That is not right! I am sorry but I refuse to have anything that I do not understand on English networks, and yes I will say it, it does make me uncomfortable. At the risk of sounding like a non-white red neck, I thought this was America!
I do not want anything that is not English on my TV or on my Ads simply because I see it as an insult. What because my people did not come to this country in massive droves I cannot go anywhere I want and expect people to speak Farsi to me? My family went through all the motions to come into this country, and coming from Iran int he 1980s to America was not easy, yet we did it. And it was fine because we followed the rules and waited the time needed before we came. I am insulted when I see people who think that they can by pass the rules. I followed them and no one gave me any special treatment when I wanted my grandmother to stay longer in this country, but she left when her visa was over and I do not understand how if we were Hispanic we would have a whole group of people fighting for her rights.
Having ads in Spanish is probably the biggest slap in the face to all of us who came to this country from a non- Spanish speaking country. We all know that there is no way we could get an ad in Japaneses put on a network, nor could we get one in Creole placed in South Florida, even though there is a big Haitian population. These things would be rejected right away, yet one in Spanish is okay why?
I am okay with all Spanish networks and magazines in my area. I am okay with being spoke to in Spanish when I go out, even though I think I should be spoken to in English, since this is America. But what I will never be okay with is having a slap in the face by people who want to be expempt from the adaptation that every other immigrant in this country had to go through.

moments that haven't yet been defined...

2008-04-24T10:09:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I got some bad news from my little brother. It turns out he has a tumor right unxer the birthmark on his face. It has only been a day since I found out but all ready I have learned a lot from it. Yes I have been researching the condition but most of what I have learned is how people react to bad news. We tend to avoid it. Talk about the issue for a second and then move onto a lighter topic. I never realized how empty words like "you will be in my thoughts" sound when they come from strangers. Do they mean it or is it just a line?

The Power Of Film...

2008-04-23T22:28:00.000-07:00

As anyone who knows me maybe able to tell I am very much anti- war in most cases, yet I tend to keep a somewhat objective view thanks to my friends and family in the military. If there is one movie thus far that I feel everyone should see about this current war it is In The Valley of Elah. This is the most compelling war movie that has ever been made, simply because it touches home with every emotion and feeling a parent would go through when a son comes back from war, missing.
The movie centers around a soldier who comes back from Iraq only to be found murdered before he ever really made it home. His father spends time looking for who the real killer is. However, the most compelling part of this movie is not the fact that the murder happened and the person involved is found. No, it is the fact that this is the only movie that touches on the pain that a soldier will go through after coming home from war. It touches on how the American people do no understand that these men go through when they are at war and the emotional toll that it takes on them. The men in this movie lost control after coming home form war.
They are lost and disconnected from everything because lets face it a day home from war it is hard to get back to reality. This movie is not trying to make any political message that are too strong other than we need to take care of our men. We cannot any longer sit aside and say we support these men without anyone trying to understand the horrible things they go through.
This movie makes the reasons we go to war and the reasons that we fight crystal clear. The title of the film is a bible reference to the battle between David and Goliath. It was in the valley of Elah that David fought and stood face to face with what caused the most fear within him. The same goes with soldiers in this war, they fight, oddly in the Middle East as well, to face their fear and hopefully, like David, win it all in the end.
Powerful is the only word I can use to capture the emotional power of this and yes this whole blog may sound off, but I have the movie on at the moment and simply do not want to loss the emotion that it is giving off.
Was this war worth it, who knows in the end.
If there is anything I am taking from this movie is that when a flag is waved at half mass it means that there is some kind of distress... this movie ends with just that and god knows if that does not bring tears then there is just ice in your heart.

When I Get Where I Am Going...

2008-04-22T11:35:00.000-07:00

(What would make a man, running for president go from doing a semi- serious interveiw... to appearing on a comdey show?)

My favorite topic at the moment is the presidental campagin. This is not because I am waiting to see who will win the Democratic party, or if we will have a black or female president. Those things are important but lets face it the same old is not what is making this season differnt. What keeps me tuned into watching political coverage at the moment is the amoung of times these canadiates are spending on regular shows, trying to prove that they are "like the average Joe."
Every campaign season is differnt, and this one seems to be running under the theme of who is the least elite and better able to connect with the American people. I love how I cannot turn on my TV anymore without seeing Obama or Clinton on a network than than CNN.
What makes these guest spots appel to me is that I have a feeling they are going to open up a whole new category in the reasons why uneduacted people vote for a person. Already people are making choices based on, "oh well she has a last name that sounds like me," or "i want him to win because he gave me a free sticker." Now all these lovely phrases will be joined with, "I want so and so to win because he/she was on my favorite show last week and was so funny."
I understand the reasoning as to why they feel as if they should be in the public eye and frankly I am loving it.
I cant wait to see where they will end up next or how far from the topics will they go before they win over all those people who sit and watch TV, all the underage voters and all the Hollywood stars before they start to loss the people who truly care for the issues.

(When did drinking shots become something a presidental hopefull will do in public?)
The things that these people are doing for votes is scary. Clinton was drinking shots with a bunch of middle aged men at a press event and Obama was seen bowling at another. To me it is funny to see how far these people will go for votes and to be likeable. What is even better is that everything they do to look normal simply just makes them look the opposite in my eyes. Do I want a president who will drinking a beer with me, or one that will make it so that I can afford that beer I like so much?

I'm Not Going To Write You To Stay...

2008-04-15T17:56:00.000-07:00

There have been many a time when the amazing people at the Daily Show find a way to say everything that I want. I do not know how Jon and the rest of his writers put the media to shame on a nightly bases for buying into political spins, but they do and I love it. Take this clip of what they said about Obama being called an elitist.

Other Peoples Misery Are Up For The Next Three Hours... Commerical Free.

2008-04-15T06:59:00.000-07:00

I am not writing this to be bitter that my class did not get a reality show when I was in high school, I promise, I swear it on my grandfathers life. But lets be honest, when did it become the trend to display ones life on national television. I understand how much people love reality these days, I really do and I admit I am a huge fan of anything consist show on TV. Yet, all the shows that I watch anyway have adults on them... although they may act like children, they are not in high school.
Having a show based on the lives of high school students seems immoral in many ways. It proves that teens are buying into the roles that networks require of them; to be the drama queen, popular ones, the hated one, the guy that every girl likes. It is sad that we have come to the point when 16 year olds are old enough to display every aspect of their lives on television, and anyone who says they are doing this to help other kids learn from their experiences is a liar.
We live in a world where everything is always on display. Facebook lets everyone of our friends know what we are doing 24/7 thanks to the newsfeed that it has. Blogs like this one allow people like me to state their opinion about anything and out it out there for the world to view. Youtube does not allow anyone to make a mistake anymore, because you fall down making a speech in front of a a group of people once, and it will be viewed and talked about forever. We are all our own celebrities these days, and anyone who goes on a reality show always has a motive to being there.
Honestly I do not think that high school students, no matter how "mature" we like to think they are, are going to act anymore natural in front of a camera as the next guy. In fact I think they were act more immature, because at this point every high school students knows what the camera is looking for in good reality drama and knows how to deliver. Also there is the factor of friends and the image that will be portrayed on TV.
I am not saying that I am not getting some weird guilty pleasure out of watching my former high school newspaper life being displayed on national television, but I do find every moment of it sad. We have a generation of kids now who do not know what privacy really is, and are willing to put their lives on display for the gain of a company like MTV, who market "coolness" to the youth, and for entertainment value.

There Is Nothing Better Than Not Knowing What's Going To Happen Next...

2008-04-13T17:28:00.000-07:00

There is no one in American politics at the moment who is more out of touch with the American public than Hilary Clinton. She has spent much of her life in the spot light of the political world, and let's face it the women comes off as dry as a piece of toast. There is no reason for Clinton, out of all people on the world, call Obama an elitist and out of touch with the American public. Being poor does make people bitter and if anyone would say otherwise then they are lying. Not having money or a job will make anyone upset and bitter at the world. Being in a tough spot will make anyone turn to religion and who knows maybe even drive a person to buy a few guns. This is the reality of the America we live in today. It is full of unsure Americans that are trying to hold onto anything to keep faith and stay face.
Clinton making any remarks about this makes her look worse!
She never, ever goes with her party and for bitterly attaching a person in the manner she did shows a lack of professionalism.
What has happened to us as a nation that we complain that people are not honest enough with us, that politicians are not as honest as they should be and as soon as one is, WE REACT THIS WAY!!
What it comes down to is that Cliton is scared she is going to lose, and because of that she is attacking others. No matter what if she wins the election then she is ensuring McCains nominations. If Obama wins, then there will be a fair race, but an elitist selfish person like Clinton does not see things this clearly.

We Don't Need To Education?

2008-04-10T13:52:00.000-07:00

When I first applied to Florida International University I did so with this silly idea that my school would provide an education that would prepare me for my feature as a journalist. Well... I was let down. And I cannot help but feel this way.
I understand that the state has budget cuts and that Educational programs tend to be among the first to go. I understand that the university needs to budget money but throughout the past two years I have been at this university they have cut the budget for the school of journalism, hired fewer teachers, offered fewer classes and have provided insignificant counsellings by changing the course work required making gradation requirements immpossible to meet.
On top of all this, today I find out that the school is willingly giving up their accreditation. This is great! Now the school I am going to has put journalism on the bottom of their to do list and put other issues ahead.
Ever wish you made a different choice in life?
I do.

I've Been Watching You Dad Ain't That Cool?

2008-04-08T15:59:00.000-07:00

I know as a daughter I have a certain amount of influence over my mother. I can tell her that an outfit does not look nice on her, and she will not buy it. I can tell her that a certain drink at Starbucks is amazing and she needs to try it, and she will. But I do not think that I would ever be able to tell her who to vote for and have her actually do it.
It has to be one of the shocking articles I have ever read in the New York Times in my life, Young Obama Backers Twist Parents' Arms. The article was about how kids are influencing their parents into voting for Obama, simply because the child believes in his policy and wants him to get more votes. Now to be honest, I am an Obama supporter and always have been, I refuse to have him get votes by people who do not support him or his policies, but rather voted for him because their little girl begged and held her breath until her father said he'd vote.
The article said that it maybe because of the close ties that kids have these days with their parents that maybe a factor in their influence in their parents vote. "Parents now are exponentially more entwined with their offspring, inclined to place their children’s emotional well-being ahead of their own. Even when students live away at college, many parents call them and send text messages every day."
Again I am all for students having a close relationship with their parents, I don't think anyone is against that, but to have the power to influence voting takes away the meaning and spirit behind democracy as a whole. A vote is supposed to be a persons voice being made. It is a personal choice, not one made by anyone else. It is upsetting that parents are so desperate these days to be closer to their kids that they will vote for a person their kid supports and in some cases even change party affiliation.
Having a college student help in a campaign is fine, having political talks with parents is wonderful too because it opens generational dialogue but voting for a person without that choice being your own... that is UnAmerican.
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/08/us/politics/08kids.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1&ref=todayspaper

You're Gonna Miss This, Your Gonna Wish These Days Hadn't Gone By So Fast...

2008-04-03T07:16:00.000-07:00

It is amazing to me still to this day how much pride can get the best of us, even when we do not want it to. It can easily make us put up walls that we never even knew we had and in many cases leave out the people in our lives that mean the most to us. The thing about pride is that it does not allows us to face our problems head on. We only really just sit there and dwel on them for a while, letting grow inside of us, while we miss the emotions that make us human in the first place.
no talking occurs when pride is in the picture.
no understanding.
no sitting down thinking of things in the other persons point of view because heaven forbid the other person may have a vaild point.
The funny thing about pride is that whenever we use it, whenever we let it get the best of us we always expect someone else to be the adlut and take over... to say sorry frist, to give the first hug and to start the first i am sorry conversation. but the catch is that this is a lot of assiming... maybe the other person will not say sorry first, and put up their walls as well.. then what are we stuck with?

wasted time over a silly argument, memories that will never be made and a broken bond... all because one person had to much pride to let a brused ego go...

Let The Angels Gatther and the Music Play...

2008-02-03T11:53:00.000-08:00

why is it that where you meet a person and what job title they think you have always effects the way they look at you. i know that if i were to meet half the people at this office in any other situation they would not talk to me as if i was a kid. they walk right by half the time because i am the secertity they feel as if they MUST say hello... so they do and dont care for a response. its just funny. these people all know my name. each of them i know it. yet they call me "the girl" what is this, i feel like cousin it. i should just call all them "the guy or the person" its annoying. people lack manners these days and the idea that others see your actions as rude is never tought to them.
but whatever karma will get them for it all.
on happy note i finished eat pray love... happy ending! she finds love! who thought lol.

Do You Ever Smile and Find It Shameful Cuz You Dont Know Who You Are?

2008-02-02T12:36:00.000-08:00

Gosh what is it about an amazing book that will make one feel redone. like everything in the world is new agian now that you have this fanastic new knowledge within you. EAT. PRAY.LOVE is now offically my favorite book of all time.

I love this book more than I can ever say! It makes me happy and relook at the fears tha often old me back. She went around the world and found everything she was looking for. So who is to say that everything is not here. Maybe traveling will bring everything that your missing out on at home. My favorite passage from the book, the one that I cannot stop reading this is...
Elizabeth, who is being called Groceries here is telling a friend about not being able to let go of her ex and the conversation that follows are the words that I cannot get out of my head:

"But i really loved him"

"Big deal. so you fell in love with someone. dont you see what happened? this guy touched a place in your heart deeper than you thought you were caple of reaching, i mean you got zaped kiddo. but that love you felt thats just the beginning. you just got a taste of love. thats just limited little rink dink mortal love. wait till you see much more deeoply you can love than that. heck groceries- you have the capacity to someday love the whole world. its yoyr destiny. dont laugh."
"I'm not laughing" I was actually crying. "And please don't laugh at me now, but I think the reason it's so hard for me to get over this guy is because I seriously believed David was my soul mate."

"He probably was. Your problem is you don't understand what that word means. People thnk a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that's holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake., But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then they leave. And thank God for it. Your problem is, you jusr can't let this one go. It's over Groceries. David's purpose was to shake you up. drive you out of that marriage that you needed to leave, tear apart your ego a little but, show you your obstacles and additions, break your herat open so new light could get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you had to transform your life. Then introduce you to your spiritual masster and beat it. That was his job. and he did it great bow its over. problem is you cant accept this realtionship had a real short shelf life. you life a dog at the dump baby your just lickin at an empry tin can trying to get more nutrintion out if it. and if your not careful that cans gonna get stuck on your snout forever and make your life miserable so drop it."

"but i love him."

"so i love him."

"but i miss him."

"so miss him."

HOW DO YOU NOT LOVE THAT!!! gosh i cannot even get worried or stressed with those words in me... I LOVE THIS! and all it took was a book!

Then We Woke Up To Find That Summer Gone...

2008-01-20T12:45:00.000-08:00

This work day will never end by all accounts and I think I have put off doing my home work long enough but the idea of doing it now does not seem to be too appling right now. I need to pick a picture and write the meanings that people can take from it on a both symbolic and literal level. The problem is I have yet to pick a photo. I am not being lazy, I promise, but doesn't every picture have a powerful meaning if it is the right one? The only photo I can think to use is the one of that Afhgan girl:

How powerful of an image is this and knowing what this girl was going through in the 80s when the photo was taken makes it the one picture I have never been able to forget no matter how hard I try. Her eyes tell it all and no matter how many pictures I look at no one else can capture the kind of pain and unknowingness that is in the eyes of this girl. I think this is the image I am going to use I just need to get around to writing. Did I mention that I am in a lazy mood.

The worst part of it all is that I want to go home, I should be home by now, It is 4:00 on a Sunday. Yet I am still stuck at the office because there people are here and I cannot leave until they do, she doesnt have a key to lock up! Whatever I get paid for the extra time but it just sucks having to stay here longer. My brother keeps calling me from home with lines from the movie airplane which does not help my boredem... hey its a rainy and cold day I would much rather be in bed right now!
If you have not seen airplane though WATCH IT! ONE OF THE FUNNIEST MOVIES MADE! EVER!
I am bored enough to put down some lines... so enjoy:

Ted Striker: My orders came through. My squadron ships out tomorrow. We're bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours. We're coming in from the north, below their radar. Elaine Dickinson: When will you be back?
Ted Striker: I can't tell you that. It's classified.
______________________________________
Rumack: You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.
Elaine Dickinson: A hospital? What is it?
Rumack: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.

_________________________________________
Elaine Dickinson: You got a letter from headquarters this morning.
Ted Striker: What is it?
Elaine Dickinson: It's a big building where generals meet, but that's not important right now.
________________________________________
Ted Striker: Because of my mistake, six men didn't return from that raid.
Elaine Dickinson: Seven. Lieutenant Zip died this morning.
________________________________________
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.
________________________________________
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking.
_________________________________________
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.
_________________________________________
Steve McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.
__________________________________________
[as the plane prepares to take off]
Hanging Lady: Nervous?
Ted Striker: Yes.
Hanging Lady: First time?
Ted Striker: No, I've been nervous lots of times.
_________________________________________
Elaine Dickinson: There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
____________________________________________
Ted Striker: Surely you can't be serious.
Rumack: I am serious... and don't call me Shirley.
_________________________________________
Rumack: Captain, how soon can you land?
Captain Oveur: I can't tell.
Rumack: You can tell me. I'm a doctor.
Captain Oveur: No. I mean I'm just not sure.
Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess?
Captain Oveur: Well, not for another two hours.
Rumack: You can't take a guess for another two hours?
_______________________________________
Rumack : What was it we had for dinner tonight
Elaine Dickinson : Well, we had a choice of steak or fish.
Rumack : Yes, yes, I remember, I had lasagna.
_______________________________________________
Controller: I know but this guy has no flying experience at all. He's a menace to himself and everything else in the air... yes, birds too.
________________________________________
[reading newspaper headlines]
Rex Kramer: Passengers certain to die!
Steve McCroskey: Airline negligent.
Johnny: There's a sale at Penney's!
__________________________________________

Oh gosh and these people are still here!!!!
I WANNA GO HOME!!
and i dont think that is happening any time soon... people have no respect!
I am finding that looking at pictures of clothing online helps, yeah I have become that bored! I did find my dress that I wroe on New Years online though... only mine is black

cute no?
OKay they're gone! I CAN GO HOME!!
YAY!

It's All A Part Of Me, That's Who I Am...

2008-01-20T11:53:00.001-08:00

Here are the rules: Type the answer to each question into a Google image search, and you pick an image from the first page of results...easy peasy...and fun!
AGE AT NEXT BIRTHDAY:: 20

FAVORITE PLACE TO BE:: THE BEACH

PLACE I WANT TO VISIT: ITALY

FAVORITE FOOD: SUSHI

FAVORITE ANIMAL: TIGER

FAVORITE COLOR: PURPLE

PLACE OF BIRTH: AHWAZ, IRAN

PET NAME: KARMA

PAST LOVE: BRAD PAISLEY

FIRST NAME: PARADISE

BAD HABIT: TEXTING

FIRST JOB: STARBUCKS

COLLEGE MAJOR: JOURNALISM

We All Have A Song That's Somehow Stamped Our Lives, Takes Us To Another Place in Time.....

2008-01-20T10:35:00.000-08:00

It really is all about the words that are said and honestly I am probably the most lyrically obessed person in the world! I love them. I find there to be no point in listening to a song if it doe snot leave you with that one line that makes you go crazy when you hear it! I can think of a million lyrics that have helped define my life better than any one liner from a show or movie. With music it is with you forever and if the song is turly perfect and well written the words just grow in instesity as you get older or find a deeper meaning with them. Either way we really do all have a song that has defined us, has helped us through a moment in our lives.... LOVE IT!

What brings this up is that I was looking up Taylor Swift lyrics at work because I am bored half out my mind and I figured it would be a good way to burn half an hour. I love her style of music, for someone who wrote most of her album at 16 this chick has talent and enough of it that it is scarry to think what amazing things will be coming out of her when she is older. But read the lyrics to this song... It is called COld As You and tell me that you never felt this same way...

You have a way of coming easily to me
And when you take, you take the very best of me
So I start a fight cause
I need to feel something
And you do what you want cause
I'm not what you wanted
[Chorus:]
Oh what a shame, what a rainy ending given to a perfect day
Just walk away, ain't no use defending words that you will never say
And now that I'm sitting here thinking it through
I've never been anywhere cold as you
You put up walls and paint them all a shade of gray
And I stood there loving you and wished them all away
And you come away with a great little story
Of a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore you
[Chorus:]
Oh what a shame, what a rainy ending given to a perfect day
So Just walk away, ain't no use defending words that you will never say
And now that I'm sitting here thinking it through
I've never been anywhere cold as you
You never did give a damn thing honey but
I cried, cried for you
And I know you wouldn't have told nobody if
I died, died for you, died for you
Oh what a shame, what a rainy ending given to a perfect day
Every smile you fake is so condescending
Counting all the scars you made
And now that I'm sitting here thinking it through

I learned the path to heaven is full of sinners and believers

2008-01-20T09:37:00.000-08:00

I am stuck! and i did not want this blog to be more of my personal venting, but I have no idea what other "bloggers" do in these things. Are you supposed to comment on current events and complain how nothing is going your way while you sit back and do nothing but make suggestions that will never be put into action. Or am I supposed to comment on pop culture and revlove my life around what Britney did. It's sad, the written word is only being kept alive online with these little post that people put up, yet, we use this to talk about the lives of others more than we should. I guess you gotta love it.
At the moment I think I have reached a point when I have found myself feeling more than me. I have decided that today will be the first day when I do not think too much about my past and those who were in it. There is no point in wasting time on what ifs and what could have beens. What is the point in sitting back and wondering what could have been or knowing what should have occured in any situtionw when there is nothing anyone can do to fix it. NO MORE WORRYING!
This is so sad. I like most people tell everyone in my life not to worry and to let it be. I tell people that things will work out in the end when in reality I believe those words as I am saying; yet, I do not take my own adivce. WHY NOT!
Of course I think it is crazy when people say they never look back or never worry. One because it is horrable to ever say never and second of all life needs some kind of relfection in order for any one person to see how far they have come. It is in the excess that I think lays the problem and that is the part that I wish to let go of.

wish me luck and sweet dreams ya'll...

And I Hope Someday You Get The Chance To Live Like You Were Dying...

2008-01-19T08:46:00.000-08:00

Hey.
Okay so I do not turn 20 until October but I have made a list for myself of, no joke, about 200 things I need to do before I hit the big 20. I know 20 may not seem that old, but to me this is the start of me not being a teenager anymore and having to act like a grown up, with no idea how to do so. I think I am going through the same mid- life crisis some people experince when they turn 50, but of course I need to get my emotional break down over with early. Just thinking that in a few months I will have lived for two decades, and the thought of what the next 10 years will bring. I will be done with school for good, I will have a real job and entire into this "real world" that everyone speaks so highly of. Who knows I may move a million times, find a great guy and God knows what else can happen.
I know it sounds too soon for me to break down about this but I feel as if this is an ending of an era for me and the start of everything else new and fresh. Dropping the teen from your ages lets go of all the childhood links that are associated to that word.
One of the things I need to get out of the way before I turn 20 is to do what I am doing right now and write in a blog. I have so many other things to do:
1. spend a day on a boat
2. go to the beach all day
3. swim with dolphins
4. find a hair color that I can live with
5. discover new local places
6. get out of the country
7. buy new cloths
8. save money
9. cook something from scrath
10. forgive someone

it may seem silly but i think having a list will make the next 9 and a half months easier... who knows maybe I will love my next 20 years.

You Don't A Reason and God Knows Don't Have the Time..

2007-09-02T12:39:00.000-07:00

I am new to this new blog thing, take it as my ode to being hunger for truth and putting what I know out there into the world. Who knows if anyone will read this or it will become me just writing a personal diary to me...

oh well time will tell...
- sweet dreams ya'll